Health

The Beginner’s Guide To Fine-Dining Terminology

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How To Plan A Sky Burial On A Budget

I view other cultures like the entries at a Sizzler: a buffet that you can pick and choose from to fill up your plate, and, if necessary, use force to seize control of the shrimp. When I learned of Tibetan sky burials, I knew I had to have one of my own. Buddhist monasteries in […]

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Your Butthole Is A Flower That Needs To Be Tended

Stop treating your A-hole like your B-hole.

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We Made 6 Acupuncturists Sleep On A Bed of Nails for A Night

We are acupuncture diehards. We even have an on-site acupuncturist here in the Bunny Ears offices named Jennifer Chen (hi Jen!) ready to skewer our allergies away with a precise strike to our acupoints at the first sign of a runny nose. So we brought her into our usual Tuesday ayahuasca editorial meeting to pitch […]

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Celebrity Advice: Quotes to Live By

Though they may or may not be “just like us,” one thing about celebrities is clear: Their lives are awesome and ours aren’t. Logically, they must have some mystical key to an awesome life beyond good bone structure and luck, right? The answer is yes and this is why we all crave celebrity advice. After […]

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Chrissy Teigen Is The Anti-Gwyneth, So I Guess We Have To Eat Her

How else shall we absorb her powers?

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A (Very) Formal Introduction To Your Gut Flora

Have you met Bacillus Subtilis?

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The New Yoga: Jogging Until You Find A Corpse

You’ll never feel so alive.

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The Beginner’s Guide to Trapping Exotic Animals

Clearly, the benefits of imprisoning decorative animals can no longer be ignored.

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Bunny Ears Essentials: Abiogenesis

Welcome to Bunny Ears Essentials! Today, our topic is abiogenesis, the origin of life in the form of simple organic compounds that arise from inorganic or non-living substances. Abiogenesis likely occurred over 3.5 billion years ago on Earth. (Don’t come at us with your panspermia hypothesis bullshit!) But don’t be fooled by how long it’s been—abiogenesis […]

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Even We’re Not Dumb Enough To Put Ginger Up Our Butts

We’ve got the ‘sticking stuff up your butt’ beat covered, thanks.

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Wait, Are Pokémon Just Pocket Slaves?

A deep dive.

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The Hottest New Look Is Bleaching Then Tie-Dying Your Butthole

Bleaching your butthole is out. Bleaching then TIE-DYING your butthole is very in.

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Your Most Worrying Moles: Ranked!

Some of these really don’t look right.

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Let Us Prepare For The Arrival Of Father Depression!

The days are getting colder, and that means Father Depression is on his way.

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Distance Acupuncture Combines Healing With The Fun Of Lawn Darts

It’s also incredibly painful.

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Champagne Bidets And Other Luxury Items That Cause Rectal Infections

FYI!

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Become More Cultured By Covering Your Genitals In Yogurt

It’s not JUST a pun (though that’s admittedly a big part of this).

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Ew. You Still Poop?

I thought you were eating clean?

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How To Get In Shape For Arm-Wrestling Season

Do you want to win the coveted Golden Wrist or not?

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Intermittent Fasting Tips From Your Unpaid Intern

‘Jennifer sometimes goes days without food!”

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Smoking Oregano Is Good For You, I Swear I Did This On Purpose

All the health benefits from this plant I definitely didn’t buy by mistake.

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Speedrun Your Way To Wellness, Any%, Deathless (Hopefully)

It’s the fastest way to take back your life.

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Natural Deodorants You Can Technically Eat If It Ever Came Down To That

Your body deserves the best.

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Treat Erectile Dysfunction By Dangling “It” Over A Pool Of Hungry Piranhas

Like, VERY hungry.

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Wilford Brimley Shares His Secret To Staying So Old

You don’t stay this decrepit by doing nothing.

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Build Your Immune System By Not Washing Your Hands After You Poop

It’s science!

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A Good Night’s Sleep Made Me A Much More Efficient Asshole

And it can work for you, too!

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Hot Ham Facials: The Newest Trend In Skin Care

That’s right. Hot ham.

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Boost Your Immune System With Ball Pit Immersion Therapy

Build up you defenses in the most disgusting place on earth!

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FACT CHECK: We’ve Only Killed Dozens Of People, Not Hundreds

We’re tired of the slander.

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The Most Essential Exercises To Avoid Being Kidnapped By Sasquatch

It’s every hiker’s worst fear.

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Is It Ethical To Put Sunscreen On Total Strangers?

“We’re all in this together, so stop squirming.”

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So You Called Mr. Feeny’s Name During Sex. Now What?

We’ve all been there.

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I Farted Really Loudly Just Now, Um, Because It’s a New Health Thing?

You have to fart otherwise you’ll get sick. Just go with me on this.

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Questions You’re Too Afraid To Ask Your Doctor About How Robots Have Sex

The most important questions you should definitely ask your doctor about robot sex, no matter how awkward you or they feel.

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Lizzo Taught Me To Love Myself, Especially My Vagina Dentata

Thank you, Lizzo.

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I’m Trying Really Hard To Not Turn Your Vitamin D Deficiency Into A Dick Joke

This isn’t easy.

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What’s In Mack’s Medicine Cabinet? Oh, It’s A Bunch Of Dead Parrots

What? Oh no.

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Improve Your Sex Life By Finally Figuring Out How Sex Works

What goes where?!

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Jade Eggs And Glam: An Original Poem

A Bunny Ears original poem.

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Don’t Just Minimize Your Pores, Psychologically Destroy Them

Humiliate them until they dissolve in shame and fear.

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You’re Using Dry Shampoo All Wrong—Stop Drinking It

What is wrong with you?

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Does Your Hair Hurt? Not Your Scalp, But Your Hair? What Did I Do?

Oh God. Is this normal?

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Is David The Gnome Daddy? An In-Depth Study

You may be surprised by these findings.

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