Vim & Vigor
Help Us Honor These Male Feminists During Women’s History Month
Where would gender equality be if Jacobson didn’t have the strength to write social media posts and that one Medium article? We’d probably lose the right to vote, that’s where!
You’ll Never Believe How Many Slides Are In This Slideshow Of Women Holding Mugs
Hint: There’s so fucking many!
Elbows Are Out: Hinges Made of Lincoln Logs Are In
Not only are my Lincoln Log hinges fashionable they also make so many daily activities better. No longer do I have to worry about damaging my joints when I do yoga.
The Best Anti-Aging Secret Is Still A Portrait That Grows Old For You
You’ll look fabulous—no matter how many atrocities you commit!
Moisturize Until You’re Frictionless And Entering The Speed Force
You will reach unfathomable velocity.
Why We Don’t Vaccinate Our Children From My Homemade Plague
What the real danger is here? A virus I specifically designed to kill 90% of the population, or the untested vaccine for it? I think you know my answer.
‘I Don’t See Disease’ Is The Hottest New Health Trend!
Don’t let disease get you down. Fight through your illness with our bold new method of denying its existence! You’ll be healthy in no time!
Oops! I Think I May Have Over-Exfoliated
As a general rule, you should never exfoliate so much that you accidentally end up brushing your teeth with your finger tips and Clinique facial scrub.
Improve Your Child’s Immunity By Coughing In Her Face
Coughing directly in your child’s face is the ecological, non-toxic, and natural way to ensure they grow healthy immune systems.
Western Medicine Is A Lie: What Are Penises REALLY For?!??!!!!!??!
Penii? Penes? Amanda, what am I supposed to write here?
This Year, Train Your Body To Tolerate More Pain With Vicodin!
Imagine a world in which knives do not exist. Picture that world, and reach into your aged leather waist satchel for more Vicodin.
Make The Most Of Your Dying Days And Multi-Task Your Bucket List
You’re going to die and nobody has a clue how it’s going to go down.
Old-Timey Car Horn Sounds To Make During A Breast Exam
A simple AYOOGA or BLEEP BLEEP can make all the difference.
The Beginner’s Guide To Pre-Emptive Amputation
There are lots of reasons to carve off one of your arms or legs before its absolutely necessary.
We Just Tried Western Medicine, And Holy Shit Is It Effective!
Have you guys ever tried antibiotics?!
Should I Use Nanotechnology To Turn My Stomach Into Several Cow Stomachs?
So I Can Thrive On Just Grass?
Get Your Strongest Core Ever With Nonstop Crying!
Some call it “Sob Crunches” while others like myself prefer “Exer-crying”.
I’m Totally Okay Being Trapped Under This Weighted Blanket
Getting crushed to death never felt so safe.
Amazing Products 100% Not Involved In The Murder I’ve Been Accused Of
Everything must go! As soon as possible!
Diagnosing Your STDs Through Musical Theater: The Music Man Edition
Here’s your official, foolproof STD diagnoses via unforgettable song stylings that, believe it or not, beat West Side Story out for a Tony. Because racism.
I Replaced My Leg Tendons (For Yoga) And Now My Leg Is Haunted
I just wanted to do one freaking pose but now I have to deal with ghosts?
How I Once Used A Bathroom In A Public Park Without Contracting Cholera
I know, it sounds ludicrous, but I assure you this is no joke.
We Asked A Personal Trainer For Workout Tips And Now We’re Fucking
We really meant to get into this whole workout thing, but then we just got carried away with the fucking. You get it, right?
Katie Goldin’s Golden Rules
Weekly comics from the mind of Bunny Ears writer Katie Goldin. They're weird, they're funny, and they're always so pretty! The Goldin Rules…