It’s no secret that we here at Bunny Ears possess the power (and privilege!) of contacting the dead. So when our CCO forced us to listen to ska punk in the office for yet another damn day, we decided to try and contact Lou Dog, the deceased Dalmatian of former Sublime frontman Bradley Nowell. It wasn’t difficult. We simply lit a few candles, chanted the lyrics to “Lou Dog Went To The Moon” six dozen times, and before we knew it, the ol’ pup was sitting across from us. This is what he said.
LOU DOG: Rabbit! RABBIT!
BE: (removes Bunny Ears): No, Lou Dog! It’s just us, the crew from Bunny Ears. We wanted to meet you.
LD: Humans! Hi. Humans!
BE: Hi, Lou Dog! Uh, so, how’ve you been?
LD: Chillin’!
BE: Rad! You mind if we ask you some questions?
LD: Hi!
BE: Awesome. So Lou Dog, what was your all-time favorite Sublime song?
LD: The one about me! AND the one. About ME!
BE: Of course!
LD: I’m a GOOD BOY!
BE: Yes you are!
LD: (drops head) Except. That one time, I ran away. Bad dog.
BE: Why did you run away that one time, Lou Dog?
LD: He said. Nowell. He don’t cry! He lied.
BE: Yeah, we figured. But tell us, why’d you do it? Why’d you run away?
LD: Trash queso.
BE: Trash queso? Like, queso in the trash?
LD: TRASH QUESO!
BE: Got it. Mmm let’s see. What was your fondest …
LD: Skanking.
BE: … memory on tour with Nowell and Sublime?
LD: Oh! The van!
BE: Yeah?
LD: The van! Smelled like. ME!
BE: We bet it did!
LD: I’m King Louie!
BE: And tell us, King Louie, because there has been much speculations over the years … why did you bite those skaters on tour?
LD: I’M A GOOD BOY!
BE: Yes, but was it because-
LD: GOOD BOY!
BE: The very best boy.
LD: GOOD BOY I’M A GOOD BOY I’M A GOOD BOY!
BE: (pets him) We know, Lou Dog. We know.
Image: Sublime Wiki
View Comments (2)
I love to smell my own farts
Hey man, to each his own