‘I Don’t See Disease’ Is The Hottest New Health Trend!

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Diseases we once thought defeated forever have been making a modern comeback, but Bunny Ears is excited to offer you an easy solution to any viral (or bacterial)-based problem you encounter: Simply refuse to see the disease! Whether you’re a staunch anti-vaxxer or just don’t want to waste a weekend in bed fighting off the flu, refusing to acknowledge the reality of the situation by claiming that you’re above it all will help you stay health and hale right up until you finally pass out from exhaustion. Denying the existence of ills works well for society, and now it can work for you too!

“I Don’t See Disease” Can Work For Anyone!

You work hard. You pay your taxes, you tip well, you’re good to your friends and family. You’re an all-around great person, so is it so hard to believe that you genuinely don’t see disease? Besides, don’t all people, healthy and sick, have plenty of opportunities in this day and age? Why would you see it?

Disease is only an issue if you let it be an issue. If you start complaining that you have a headache, or that your nose is running, or that you’re bleeding out of orifices you don’t normally bleed out of, then before you know it you’ll be seeing everything through the lens of disease. People already say that viruses can make you sick. Where does it end? Are we going to start believing that viruses can make us hungry too? We bet you’ve heard someone complain that they lost their job because of disease, but you know the truth—they just didn’t work as hard as you.

Not Seeing Is Believing!

So keep that hard work up and insist you just don’t even register the illnesses affecting the lives of others. Sure, maybe life with a disease isn’t perfect, but think of the diseases they have in other countries! Shouldn’t we be acknowledging their problems instead of worrying about the far less serious diseases we have over here? That puts the people asking for an extra sick day or a new kidney in perspective, doesn’t it?

What’s important is that you treat everyone the same, whether they’re currently being ravaged by a crippling malady or not. Both the sick and the healthy have access to the same services, so no one should get unique considerations just because they’re currently vomiting up a lung. You wouldn’t demand special treatment if you were sick, so it just seems unreasonable for others to demand it from such a caring human being like yourself.

Images: Pixabay, Pixabay

 


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Mark Hill: Mark has written for Cracked, the Modern Rogue, McSweeney's Internet Tendency, the Atlantic, Motherboard, the Daily Dot, and a bunch of other places that he can't remember off the top of his head. He also writes most of the nation's grocery lists.
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