A Psychic Helped Me Unleash My Inner Power, But Keeps Spoiling “WWE RAW” For Me
Everything was so hazy at first… In the distance, I saw myself in a board meeting, and I was CEO, my eyes glowing with pride. Shadows parted way, and I suddenly saw myself on a date with a perfect 10, confident, stylish, leaning in for a first kiss. But the fog returned, and when it […]
Why Won’t John Cena Visit Me in the Hospital?
It’s a phrase I’ve seen a thousand times on armbands, miniature towels, and neon-bright t-shirts throughout the last 15 years. It’s not just a saying, but a way of life; a mantra which one can turn to when their dreams seem so far out of reach. Yet as I lay here on this hospital gurney, […]
A Guide To Grieving All The Yoshis You’ve Killed
The first stage of grief is harder than the last stage of Forest of Illusion.
How To Politely Decline An Invite To Your Dork Nephew’s ‘Warcraft’ Wedding
He’s marrying an orc or whatever.
I Shot The Dog In ‘Duck Hunt’ And It Really Messed Me Up
Your cousin lied when he said he shot the dog in Duck Hunt. Because if he had, he’d be scarred for life.
Which Member of GWAR Should You Hire To Tutor Your Child?
The Berserker Blothar? Or perhaps Bonesnapper?
We Found Carmen Sandiego, She Was Just in the Bathroom for a Really Long Time
Should we slide a magazine under the door or something?
Oh No, The Dog With A Blog Pivoted To Video And Is A ‘Breed Realist’ Now
He has some deeply uncomfortable things to say about Anatolian Shepherds on YouTube.
The Bad Dudes Are Really Good Dudes, And They’re My Uncles
I don’t know why everybody called my uncles “Bad Dudes,” because they were good dudes. More than good. Probably the best people I’ll ever know.
All The Pills From Dr. Mario Ranked By How High They Get You
Take the blue pill, take the red pill, take all the pills from Dr. Mario. (Except for the red-blue one.)
We Revisited ‘Romeo And Juliet,’ And It’s Honestly Kind Of Problematic
The people of 1597 should be ashamed.
What ‘Back To The Future’ Gets Wrong About Almost Having Sex With Your Mom
Like she’ll DEFINITELY remember your face.
Where Are They Now? The Relationships Of ‘Clueless’
Bunny Ears got to sit down with the relationships of Clueless to see how they’re doing now.
Exclusive: Macaulay Culkin Interviews The Swarm Of Bees From My Girl
(Editors Note: After a considerable amount of negotiation between a phalanx of lawyers, agents, managers, publicists, stylists, socialists and one 76-year-old beekeeper from Arizona, Bunny Ears is proud to share the EXCLUSIVE reunion interview between Macaulay Culkin and the swarm of bees that viciously attacked him in the 90’s hit My Girl. What follows was transcribed, […]
The Best Foods To Eat In Your Room While Your Parents Fight Downstairs
This is how you learned to eat your feelings.
Stubborn Fan Still Chants ‘ECW!’ At Shows
“Is he just chanting ‘NXT’ wrong?” asks 23-year-old Velveteen Dream.
5 Tough Video Game Characters That I Could Easily Beat In A Fist Fight
I’ve thought about this a lot.
Other Texas Cities And Minerals DDP Tried Before Making It Big
Like ‘Fluorite Amarillo Page,’ and more!
We Replaced All References To Tiny Tim In ‘A Christmas Carol’ With Baby Yoda
‘Alas for Baby Yoda, he bore a little crutch, and had his limbs supported by an iron frame!’
Uh-Oh…CM Punk Got Seth Rollins As His Double Kayfabe Super Secret Santa
Luckily, he’s AWESOME at gifts.
Creationists Group Does Not Believe Luchasaurus Is Real
‘The Earth was created in six days, and Luchasaurus was not a part of it.’
Which Wrestler Should You Bring To Your Family’s Annual Holiday Fight?
Ken Shamrock? Or perhaps Tatanka?
What Your Favorite Pro Wrestlers Are Getting Each Other For Christmas This Year!
Pro wrestlers LOVE the holidays!