Articles

People always told me there was no way I’d ever be able to manage a hive of bees like the trendy rooftop beekeepers of New York City, and oh boy, did it feel good to silence all the haters when I proved them right. I think I knew I wouldn’t be a good beekeeper when […]

At Bunny Ears, we do our best to help turn new moms into supermoms. Now that you’ve survived labor and lost the baby weight, it’s time for an actual challenge! Check out these super-sick breastfeeding tricks, each one guaranteed to turn your daily milking into the intense, body-busting competitive sport you better rock if you […]

When it comes to men, I’ve been around the neighborhood a few times, if you know what I mean. What I mean is that I have been dumped by various men in various places in the town where I live throughout the years. Come with me, if you like, as I relive this journey and […]

Why Is Everyone Talking About Eggs? Eggs have become such a hot-button issue in our society. Are they good for you? Do they have too much cholesterol? How runny is over-medium supposed to be? And most importantly, as I’ve recently gathered from hushed conversations in coffee shops that I had to strain to barely eavesdrop […]

Welcome to The Beginner’s Guide to [Blank], our recurring series in which our experts provide everything you need to know about a multitude of endeavors. This week’s writer, Carolyn Burke, will be taking you through: The Beginner’s Guide To Taking Care Of Your Aging Stage Mom From Carolyn: I’ve never been particularly close with Mother. To be […]

Welcome to The Beginner’s Guide to [Blank], our recurring series where our experts provide everything you need to know about your new endeavor, regardless of what it is. Life is full of exciting opportunities, and while it’s fine to tackle a new adventure on your own, we here at Bunny Ears know that it’s better to […]

Taking care of my health is very important to me. But I’m a very busy woman and I don’t have the time to keep track of which vitamins, minerals, and birth controls I’ve ingested in the past 24 hours. That’s why I’m so in love with the vitamin tampons trend. So convenient for an on-the-go […]

We know you’re probably sick of reading lemon-stuffing articles. Almost every lifestyle blog has been pumping these out like, well, butt lemons. But we promise this definitive guide to lemon stuffing will be the last article you ever have to read about stuffing lemons up your butt! Bunny Ears has your back (which will soon […]

We’re saying ‘yes’ to summer and ‘no more’ to your lawsuits!

We know we’re going to catch some heat over this month’s pick for color of the month (get ready to weather the storm of all those angry pro-Orange comments, everyone). But pound for pound, no other color on the spectrum of visible light brought their A-game quite like that plucky little quartet from Oklahoma City, […]

[vc_row][vc_column][vc_column_text]This month’s Bunny Ears’ Color of the Month is magenta, AKA, the manliest of colors. We know what you’re probably thinking. Magenta? Isn’t that one of those fru-fru colors for fancy boys and jockeys, like salmon, or teal? Isn’t it the color of princess parties, and girls like Zoe Kravitz? And aren’t the only people […]

It goes with literally everything—especially your tears.

Keep this insane ruse going just a little longer!

Yum!

‘There’s just so much pus.’

Get it!

We’re saying it loud, and we’re saying it proud!

It’s so, so satisfying.

We’re so excited about our favorite green smoothie at Bile, Los Angeles’s opulent private juice dojo, that we decided to try making one at home. The object of our obsession is the Manaus, a jade green superfood confection made with a touch of poison dart frog venom for paralyzing the face’s unnecessary smiling muscles. We […]

You know what they say: Candy is dandy, but the call of the void will send you spiraling down into an existential crisis. No matter how much you try to avoid it, there will be times in your life when you’ll question the meaning of everything and, indeed, the very nature of the universe. So […]

In Ancient Greece, it was known that the true hero is one who journeys to die without hesitation, but with strength and purpose. Which is why it’s actually super good news that you’re dying next week! You’ve got seven whole days to imbue your life with strength and purpose, and gain the little “hero” badge […]

On Friday, a framed canvas version of rogue street artist Banksy’s famous painting, Girl With Balloon, sold at auction for $1.1 million, only to immediately self-destruct when a mechanism within the frame shred the piece upon sale.   Because you are doubtlessly a collector of fine art, and that man clearly has a finite number […]

Today’s morning routine: ELLA GALE Here at Bunny Ears, we’ve loved working with this Los Angeles based “comedian” and freelance writer. She has walloped us with her passion for everything from corsetry to green juice. Ella Gale lives in Hollywood (heard of it?) with a mounted deer skull named Buckminster Skuller and whichever of her […]

Look, I get it. The water in the sensory deprivation tank I loaned to the Bunny Ears office is very soothing. It plunges your mind into a deep state of meditative contemplation. The salinity of the water that keeps you suspended on the surface is as close to feeling the weightlessness of space as you’ll […]

Guidance. We all seek it, but few can look high beyond the clouds to truly comprehend which direction to go. Luckily, horoscopes are a quick and easy way to attain clarity. So eyes to the fluffy, clouded skies and saddle up as we channel one of our oldest dating apps, the Ouija board, to connect […]

The Zodiac guides us through challenges in life. The stars are as wise as they are numerous, and strongly advise which recipes you should use to prepare salmon! Aries (Mar 21 – Apr 19) Those who fall under the sign of Aries are teeming with chaotic energy. Mars, god of war, compels you to seek […]

Finally!

Hello everyone. World-famous actor and legendary human being Macaulay Culkin here. Now, most of you have been admiring me from afar for several decades, and let me be the first to say thank you, I’m flattered. But let me also be the first to say that after years of near-Biblical fame and adulation, I’m ready […]

Boy-boy-boy do they make no sense!

What? Oh no.

I gave birth to him, and I can un-give it.

You can do this.

Here’s what you need to know.

Words of affirmation cost extra.

I honestly don’t see the problem.

Who invited Steve?

Bunny Ears is proud to introduce our newest scented candle, Mispronunciation. It’s handmade (wingmade?) by tiny hummingbirds using all organic wax (both bees and ear), and the scent will make you feel like you just heard someone mispronounce a word. It’s schadenfreude sprinkled with notes of superiority and hints of annoyance. Mispronunciation was inspired by […]

I’ve never been what one would call “conventionally attractive.” I’ve struggled with my weight since I was a kid, and I’m below average, height-wise. Mean classmates (and my parents) called me Grimace. My body image issues got so bad that I loathed and feared looking in the bathroom mirror each day. But I’m proud to say […]

I love writing for Bunny Ears, because our readers are so knowledgeable! They’ve got a perfectly manicured grip on so many topics, from crystal healing to crystal decorating. That’s why, instead of advising you on romantic woes and pelvic architecture, I now turn to you for help. Yesterday, my dog ate my tarot deck, and […]

There’s a whole world of fun back there to enjoy while the goons drive you to the murder spot.

Read this guide / when you slide / to a world of fear and trepidation.

Your vacation won’t be relaxing if you have to scream, “I want water! Water. WATER. WAAAT-ERR!” every time you’re thirsty.

In our first teaser video, Macaulay Culkin paints some bunny ears on a wall. Part of our mission here at BE is to always encourage free expression. Creative freedom is crucial to a happy and healthy lifestyle. In the video, Mack shows us how easy it can be to let yourself go nuts creatively and […]

Macaulay Culkin meets his most-obsessed fan.

He was paid in experience.

Have you ever felt just a little TOO nude while doing naked karate?

Don’t even introduce yourself.

They are connoisseurs of tushie excellence.

It’s the literally the worst place!

It’s a phrase I’ve seen a thousand times on armbands, miniature towels, and neon-bright t-shirts throughout the last 15 years. It’s not just a saying, but a way of life; a mantra which one can turn to when their dreams seem so far out of reach. Yet as I lay here on this hospital gurney, […]

We know you’ve always thought about it.

Krakoa is getting REALLY popular.

He’s reportedly been ranting about it for months.

Exciting!

Weekly comics from the mind of Bunny Ears writer Katie Goldin. They’re weird, they’re funny, and they’re always so pretty! The Goldin Rules always offers something different! You’ll never see the same joke twice!

Welcome to Art Friends. A weekly web-comic brought to you by Ana Bagayan, the creator of viral-hit Ana’s Dollhouse!

It’s better than ‘Family Circus’ but shittier than ‘Marmaduke’ because everything is shittier than ‘Marmaduke.’

SPOILER ALERT!

Have you talked to your kids?

It’s time someone said something.

He’s marrying an orc or whatever.

Your cousin lied when he said he shot the dog in Duck Hunt. Because if he had, he’d be scarred for life.

I don’t know why everybody called my uncles “Bad Dudes,” because they were good dudes. More than good. Probably the best people I’ll ever know.

“Is he just chanting ‘NXT’ wrong?” asks 23-year-old Velveteen Dream.

I still don’t know why.

There’s so many!

You don’t need him anyway!

Was it Carl Winslow? Or maybe Danny Tanner?

A butt plug? Or perhaps a rubber fist?