Exclusive: Macaulay Culkin Interviews The Swarm Of Bees From My Girl
(Editors Note: After a considerable amount of negotiation between a phalanx of lawyers, agents, managers, publicists, stylists, socialists and one 76-year-old beekeeper from Arizona, Bunny Ears is proud to share the EXCLUSIVE reunion interview between Macaulay Culkin and the swarm of bees that viciously attacked him in the 90’s hit My Girl. What follows was transcribed, as recorded, at the prestigious John L. Tishman Auditorium as part of the NYU film program titled “A Conversation Amongst Stars.”)
Hey, gang, how have you BEEn?
The Swarm (buzzing):
Oh no. Is this whole thing just an excuse for horrible bee-related puns and wordplay?
You haven’t changed, kid.
Haha. Okay, but seriously, how’s life?
Honestly, things are great for us. We’re living in a hive down in the AZ–
Right. So, we’re over there. Life’s good. Honey production is up. The new queen is really something else. Lovely woman. Sends her regards. She’s a big fan.
Right on. You also retired from acting, right?
Oh Lord, yes. We had a solid run after My Girl because we rolled right into shooting Candyman. That was a wonderful experience, but we were let down by the final film. It was hard being heard over Philip Glass’s droning score.
That was you guys? In the horror flick, right?
You couldn’t tell? Do we all look alike to you or something?
Just kidding. We do literally all look the same.
Wait, wait. Let’s back it up a bit. Was My Girl your first film?
It was our first project as a swarm. Frank had gotten his stinger in the door a few years prior. He played the bee in Honey, I Shrunk the Kids. Went through the whole special effects process and everything. It was remarkable work for its time.
Sure, sure. Those same Hollywood SFX wizards turned me into a cartoon for Pagemaster. It felt weird, but the final film looks great.
So, anyway, without giving the whole IMDB rundown, after Frank got us in the door we did a couple of B-movies.
I thought they only made one Bee Movie.
Haha. No, we made B-films. Like, schlocky horror flicks and stuff.
Oh. OH. (laughs) I see.
However, we were ALSO in the Bee Movie. We were Jerry’s original inspiration for the script.
Oh cool. Are you still in touch?
Oh yeah. Jerry’s the kind of guy who just becomes, like, a lifelong friend. He’s fantastic. We’ve even discussed appearing on his talk show. We’ll see.
What kind of car would you want him to pick you up in? A VW Bug??!!!
(Buzzing slightly intensifies.)
Anyway, after you wrapped Candyman what was next?
Well, our final performance was in Aquila and the Bee. By that point the offers had dried up and we were relegated to background status. We were also getting on in age. We knew it was time to head back to the hive produce some offspring and let them carry on. We actually met our new queen on the set of Aquila and the Bee; Hit it off almost instantly and it’s been bliss ever since.
Okay, so, I want to shift gears a little bit here and discuss something… uh… well, I want to talk about a sort of touchy subject… Colony collapse disorder.
We figured this question would come up–
I don’t mean to be insensitive–
No, no. We’ll answer this, but then we want to move on–
Sure, sure. Fine.
Look, when we left our original Queen we were aware that it could induce CCD–
But you still abandoned her for Hollywood.
“Abandon” is a harsh word. We didn’t–
Let’s call it what it was though, right?
The Swarm (buzzing aggressively):
We followed our dreams. Is that so wrong?
I’m not saying it’s wrong, but–
You have no idea how hard it is being a worker bee for a thankless queen. She was relentlessly demanding of our time. When Frank went off to shoot Honey, I Shrunk The Kids it just infuriated her further. She became unbearable.
So you left.
We seized an opportunity–
To the detriment of–
The hive was already in trouble!
But it’s not just your hive that was affected! You inspired millions of other bees to up and leave their queen. You caused the loss of the colonies which had a significant economic impact on the agricultural industry. Over 10 million beehives collapsed in a six year span!
Okay, we’re done–
You have to at least answer for–
–the destruction of–
This is also a beekeeper issue–
–It’s a matter of ethical beekeeping–
(Crosstalk. Shouting. The Swarm descends upon Mack. Stinging.)
Ow! Fuck! NOT THE BEES!! This is just like that movie!
No, the Nicolas Cage movie, Ghost Rider, because this is also unbearable and I just want it to end!
(Stinging intensifies. End recording.)
[Editor’s Note: Mack is fine. After being rushed to the hospital and treated for over 22k stings he made a full recovery and he thanks everyone for the outpouring of support and well-wishes.]
Amazing work with the Nicker in Wicker.
I laughed so hard I shit myself, changed underwear, kept reading and boom another deuce from laughing so hard. Macally cuckson you have done it again, you broke the interwebs and made me ruin two pairs of boxers, I need a refund, but first I gotta suck a dick.
I really thought there would be more of a BUZZ around this article…no? No one? Ok..
This is the finest interview I have ever read.
This is the content that will save 2018
those little sons of bitches! They’ll never work in this town again!
This is hilarious!
I love you McCauley ❤️❤️❤️
I kinda wanna see a Mac and Anna Chlumsky reunion now! 😀
Awesome… thank God, something to read thats mindlessly entertaining. Sometimes you just need a break from the world.
Are you ever going to interview Paris?
i was hooing for an actually clip
I enjoyed reading this.
What scroddle-headed scribblets. Clever concept, but Mack needs to step it up with the hard hitting interviews else he blends into the homogeneity of the propaganda machine. Not looking for fluffer foreplay here, folks. We want in-depth spreads on our guests we cannot get elsewhere. In this instance, we missed the opportunity to penetrate past their hive mind, a mirror really, and get to the core of each individual essence. Perhaps we would have learned more of ourselves. If nothing else, we want to know if they are (((busy bees))).
Hey, I’m digging this site. Great job everyone!
Mack, you truly are a comedic genius! Loved it
Shouldnt have pushed it at the end man. You were asking for that beet down. Hahaha this whole site is so awesome. Looking forward to more content.
Ur so fucking funny! 😂 I thought it was a little throwed but cool! I think I want to get more up dates of what crazy-shit ur up to. Keep doing what ur doing! And I think ur SO right about the little boy in home alone. I think he should of called the cops too! I’ve seen all ur movies. My favorite was, of course, my girl.
But with home alone I think they OVER-KILLED it with the 3rd one! Thank you so much for being you! God bless you and have a wonderful day!😁
You brought up Pagemaster. Instant nostalgia. Loved this. Amazing work. How on earth did you find talking bees!!! 👅👄
This was absolutely brilliant. I had no idea you were such a comedy genius! 😅 Welcome back, and welcome to social media – happy to support your new endeavors 😍
See our Bunny Ears candies online. If you like I can send you samples for your next event/party.
We have something in common. Our Bunny Breakers. Email me your address to see samples.
OMG.. I couldn’t BEElieve how funny this was!
Macaulay culkin wears permithrin cologne to curb his bee related ptsd.
This was gold. Thank you!
You’re welcome! Thanks for reading!
What a 🐝utiful interview. My name means honeybee in greek and most of the time I think Im a queen….. of the idiot savant variety so I HAD to check this out. ⭐
That was funny as hell! Great job Mack, love you!
the years before Starbucks…”the Bunn years”
*Akeelah and the Bee
this is the purest thing I have ever read
Okay, I have to admit, that was fun. Can’t wait to see what comes next.
Lmao really dope.
Lmao that was dope.
Hilarious this site is great.
You are hilarious. This interview was hilarious.
Thanks! Tell 10,000 friends!
This was what I needed ,I love this.
How about a word to the mood ring…..
This was a great read, but it really got special when it got serious. Nothing makes an absurd joke like fully committing and taking it seriously. Loved this. I’m gonna share it with the people.
really weird but cool
weird but cool
I love it bunnyman. Keep on hopping!
Love ur website. U make my day go by a little better when I c ur outrageous comments! Keep on hopping. I did have 2 sweet bunny pets, Harvey and Wally but they passed due 2 an upper respiratory infection.
Ur Hoppin Friend
Finally, something good to read on the internet! Well done, sir.
This was fucking awesome
damnnn … hilarious piece
This is possibly the best article I’ve ever read! 😂😂 My Girl was on repeat when I was little!
Love the BunnyEars postcast, keep it up!
Funny and brilliant, as always!
This is so hysterical to me. I loved My Girl so much growing up. Still do. Very moving film but this is just sooooo funny.
Nice to know there was no tension between actors during the shooting of My Girl. The bees put on a magnificent performance- I totally lost my cool when he went back for the mood ring :^(
Buzzing slightly intensifies. Hilarious.
Absolutely hilarious. Love your work Mack and your sense of humour. And the ghost rider reference made me burst out laughing too. Keep up the excellent work all.
HI,MR. MACK HOW ARE YOU?
Where did all of the articles go?
We are currently working on stuff and will be back in two weeks!
Awesome stuff! Too funny
Leave a comment