…Hitler Pleads With Time Travelers To Stop Killing Him…
…Kid Rock Now Available In Menthol…
…Fun Run Isn’t…
…Half The World’s Bees Have Never Seen The Show Seinfeld…
…Tampax Introduces Pink-Colored Products Just For Women…
…Bunny Ears wins prestigious Bunny Ears website of the year award at the Bunny Ears Awards…
…Devastating New Documentary Changes Nothing…
…Overweight Hipster Dieting Ironically…
…70 Percent Of Americans Don’t Get Enough Sheep…
…Don’t Forget To Grab Milk…
…Dems Vow To See Zach Snyder Cut Of Mueller Report Released To Public…
…Most Rocks Are Walnuts…
…Little Bits Of Paper Left On Starburst Counts As Fiber…
…Woman Totally Okay With Turning 23…
…No One Looks Good In Jeans…
…6 Year Online Romance Ends In Weird Handshake…
…Blood Drive Cookie Tastes Like Blood…
…KFC Secret Recipe Has Been Inside You All Along…
…California Bans Genetically Modified Farmers…
…Best Way To Get Rich: Finding Bag Of Money In Woods…
…A New Generation Of Turtles Are Learning Martial Arts…
…Mother Struggles To Explain Scott Baio To Her Child…
…Gordon Ramsay Signed Beef Wellington Sells For 1.6 Million…
…Mayor Doesn’t Declare Opposite Day…
…Overweight Hipster Dieting Ironically…
…Your Dog Might Have A Secret Passport…
…Shazaam not a real movie…Google it…
…Ambitious Widower Gets Stages Of Grief Down To Four…
…Opinion: I Have The Best Smile And Coolest Personality …
…Thinking Outside The Box Leads To Unimaginable Sorrow…
…Rest Of Maroon 5 Probably Has Names…
…Girl Scouts Unveil Four New Flavors Of E-Juice…
…Fancy Teens Start Garage Orchestra…
…Dollars to donuts exchange crashing…
…Help, I’m Trapped In A Headline Writing Factory. Details To Follow…
…Opinion: We’re In A Golden Age Of Trash Talking…
…Scientists Discover That Human Body Is Disgusting…
…Trail Mix Sustains Man For Journey To, From Trail Mix Bowl…
…RC Cola Secret Recipe Kept In Open Shoebox In Headquarters Lobby…
…Everyone In Hardware Store Clearly Planning A Murder…
…It’s Cool To Wear Organs On The Outside Now…
…Gap Year Spent Working At The Gap…
…Lady In Old House In Neighborhood Not Witch, Just Regular Murderer…
…’Glow Up’ Discovered To Just Be DBZ Reference…
…According to studies accordions are unsteady…
…Confirmed: Everyone is hanging out without you…
…Below Surface, Small Town Exactly What It Seems…
…Michelle Obama Spotted Sneaking Vegetables Into Sleeping Kids’ Mouths…
…Children May Be Stupider And Weaker Than Previously Thought…
…Dip Can Be Eaten Without Chips…
…Man Experiences The Miracle Of Flight With Powerful Bidet Toilet Attachment…
…Man Who Bought Tampons For Girlfriend Expected More Fawning…
…Picture Now Worth About 40 Words…
…Prophecies Of Nostradamus’ Page-A-Day Calendar Ends On March 9th…
…60-Year-Old Man Doesn’t Feel A Day Over 58…
…Horrible Man Drives Wonderful Car…
…Thing Assumed To Be Chocolate-Filled Turns Out To Be Blueberry-Filled…
…Fourth grade teacher found to be not as hot as you remember…
…Netflix Adds Fifth Movie…
…Scientists Discover A Lot Of Cool Junk In Older Brother’s Room…
…Community Garden Offers Free, Gross Vegetables To Neighborhood…
…Man Finds Mannequin Far Too Attractive…
…Santa is real, and he lives in your crawl space….
