Luis is a columnist for Cracked.com and an astral projection of an unfathomable being from across the universe.
I wouldn’t recommend it.
I’m going to kick their ass.
We need to turn the car around.
I’m definitely probably not alone in this, right?
Not cool.
Your failure is written in the stars.
It hurts so good!
I truly don’t know how much clearer I can be on this.
And it can work for you, too!
You can get through this.
Like she’ll DEFINITELY remember your face.
Have you ever felt just a little TOO nude while doing naked karate?
We see you.
But have you?
You probably thought you’d be Rey. Or maybe Han?
Yes, my gyoza IS pizza-themed!
It’s never been wrong before…
Anything’s better than spending another minute with your family.
It’s so insulting.
Many have tried. Few have succeeded.
This isn’t easy.
Don’t you just hate it when we start going crazy when you’re without your phone for a week after a mass assailant robs you of it at gunpoint? Me too.
Get it right!
Yes, your eyes WILL fly out of your head and dangle on your cheeks. But you’ll have confronted your fears in the process.
Mack is joined by Mike Stoklasa, Rich Evans, and Jay Bauman.
At your wit’s end with your kids eating their boogers instead of your delicious homemade meals?
X-Box controllers are expensive. Try throwing these unimportant things instead.
The secret to rebuilding my confidence was admitting that I needed help – the help of a trusted therapist and of a pair of 5-foot-tall circus stilts.
And that’s the only reason.
When Bunny Ears used a stock image of my face in an article about micropenises, I thought my life was over. It was only just beginning.
Everyone told me a male game developer shouldn’t try to make a feminist video game about the gender pay gap. But I did it anyway.
Not everybody gets to stay at the most beautiful and luxurious hotels in the world. Especially not you anymore after what you’ve done in them.
And he’s gonna be a mighty king!
Look, we get it. There’s no need to preach to us about how good dog meat can be, and finding a healthy, delicious, vegan alternative can be difficult. Enter jackfruit, a freaky-looking, spiky fruit native to the tropical lowlands of Southeast Asia. Its meaty texture and neutral flavor will leave you amazed that you’re not […]
I thought my life was over when I changed my identity and was forced into hiding. But boy was I wrong
If your kid prefers squishing a disgusting substance between their fingers more than interacting with you, then congratulations, this guide is for you.
Ever feel like you’re letting your poops go to waste? Have you ever considered dropping them on the doorstep of people who may or may not need them?
Cut out the middleman and prep for the bully’s palette instead! It’s good to know there’s at least one person likes your cooking.
Only after I personally tell every sentient creature that I’m super shy will the world finally understand my struggles as an introvert.
Watching porn on the bus doesn’t make me weird. It makes me a sex positive revolutionary on the front lines in the war between prudishness and pleasure.
All you had to do was let the natural detoxifying wonders of charcoal clean out your pores. You couldn’t even do that without being racist, could you?
There are so many substances you can use to masturbate. All that I ask is that you don’t use my luxurious moisturizer. It’s not too much to ask, is it?
You are paying $8 an ounce for LIES
It began as a lazy reason to create some more fine Internet Content. It ended with a morbid obession that brought us to the brink of perpetual moistness.
There’s a valid reason. Kinda.
