Travel Guide: Under The Sea
The ocean is terrible and full of scary fish and fish-monsters. Why do you want to go there? What’s wrong with you?
7 Unbelievable Places People Have Barfed In This Dave & Buster’s
Oh gross, they barfed in this excerpt. C’mon!
Travel Guide: The Secret Canadian Disneyland ONLY For Illuminati
You’ve heard of Club 33, right? You know, that secret club at Disneyland you can only get into if you know the right people where they probably, like, smoke cigars and pass around a poor girl who moved to Hollywood with dreams of being an actress but ended up playing Cinderella for most of her […]
Valentine’s Day Trips To Make You Realize You Never Loved Each Other
Here are some recommendations for weekend trips that will make this Valentines Day unforgettable. Even if it means you’ll never forget how bad it was.
Macaulay Culkin’s Pointed Guide To New Orleans
New Orleans celebrates Mardi Gras the two weeks before Shrove Tuesday, which is … when?
Macaulay Culkin’s Pointed Guide To Las Vegas
If you’re in Vegas, you’re going to end up with the body of a dead hooker – either accidentally or on purpose, so it’s best to plan ahead!
Luxurious Ski Resorts You Couldn’t Get Into, So Actually Nevermind
You probably wouldn’t even know what to do if you did get into one anyway.
Ice Hotels to Visit Now Before They Melt And Probably Catch Fire
Be prepared to pay one billion dollars for that second checked bag, because things are about to get crazy.
Travel Guide: Night Vale
I don’t really know how I ended up in Night Vale. No one here does. One day, you just find yourself there.
The Best Illegal Souvenirs From Around The World (That Aren’t Shirts)
Because fuck shirts. Except ours, you should buy ours with that link to your right.
The Best Places in Calgary to Make Fun of Canadians
And so I’ve fulfilled all legal requirements to write off this trip on my taxes!
#Getaway: The New Vacation Everyone Needs To Take
Let’s face it: in 2018, what even is a great vacation anymore? Destination trips are filled with unpleasant surprises, from last second price hikes, children being eaten by alligators, and fucking sand. Likewise, it’s increasingly difficult to find the time, what with more and more millennials taking gigs and second jobs just for the opportunity […]
Travel Guide: The Car Trunk You’re Locked In
There’s a whole world of fun back there to enjoy while the goons drive you to the murder spot.
Travel Guide: A Creepy Chocolate Factory For Which You’ve Won A Tour
Read this guide / when you slide / to a world of fear and trepidation.
European Cities That Won’t Stretch Your Comfort Zone As A Whitey
Your vacation won’t be relaxing if you have to scream, “I want water! Water. WATER. WAAAT-ERR!” every time you’re thirsty.
Beautiful Places In The World To Wake Up On Purpose This Time
People say it’s not about the destination but the journey to get there—but I say as long as you made it there in one piece, who cares how it happened.
Serene Bottomless Pits To Visit This Summer
You’ll want to stare into these bottomless, lonely cavities for the rest of your life.
Vacation Guide: The Closet Of The Woman You’re Having An Affair With
Take in the view of those hangers!
What To Do With That Icelandic Elf You Accidentally Murdered
It was somewhere between Reykjavík and Midborg.
Travel Guide: The Inside Of A JNCO Jeans Leg
These jeans are the ultimate staycation location for those times you want to get away but don’t want to go very far.
Need A Vacation From Your Vacation? Try Your Job!
Anything’s better than spending another minute with your family.
The Most Instagrammable Ways To Die This Summer
Sure, death is forever. But so is the perfect instagram pic!
Travel The World By Recapturing Those 13 Evil Ghosts You Released
You’ll wish these demon spirits escaped every year!
Spruce Up Your Dead Uncle’s Creepy Cabin For A Cheap Summer Vacay
Better make sure you rejuvenate your dead uncle’s creepy cabin before you start summer vacation.
Our Vacation Packing Guide Is So Light, You’ll Die Of Exposure
Vacation should be about leaving your old life and tired connections behind, along with most of your clothes and ALL of your money!