White Nationalism Officially Declared Symptom Of Hulkamania

January 2, 2020 by , featured in Wrestling
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The American Psychological Association has officially confirmed that the recent increase of white supremacy within the United States is a result of latent Hulkamania. For over 30 years, mass Hulkamania has spread across America, with many of those afflicted going untreated.

“We saw so many of our patients come crashing down and hurt inside,” said APA president Margie Davis. “It got to the point where we could not let it slide.”

Let Me Tell You Something about the Symptoms, Brother

Most of the symptoms suffered by these Hulkamaniacs appear harmless at first. For example, a common sign is the overuse of the term “brother” in casual conversation. This can mutate into discussions about exclusionary white nationalist “brotherhoods.”

“My Hulkamania came out of nowhere,” said Hulkamania survivor Lance McCready. “I lost an entire closet of shirts due to habitually tearing them off my body, but I was in denial. If it weren’t for the intervention of my wife, I’d be on a street corner yelling at people to take their vitamins, say their prayers, and that they will not replace us.”

Hulkamania Will Never Die (Without Proper Treatment)

“It’s a nightmare,” said Hulkamaniac Wilbur Clint. “I was just having a picnic at the park with my family when a person of color jogged past us. The next thing I know, I’m standing in front of that poor man with my eyes bulged, finger pointed at him, screaming ‘YOU!’ at the top of my lungs. It was a wake-up call.”

Other signs of Hulkamania include the following:

  • Paranoia
  • Sun tan addiction
  • Baldness denial
  • Extreme bodily shaking after mild impact
  • Delusions of grandeur regarding Metallica
  • The belief that everyone is at least a little racist, and “that’s okay”

If you are experiencing any of these symptoms, white nationalist or otherwise, please seek medical attention. Also, please note that sun tan addiction, baldness denial, and paranoia could also be symptoms of Macho Madness.

Image: WWE


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