Our Scientists Discovered RKOs Don’t Actually Come From ‘Outta Nowhere’

July 11, 2019 by , featured in Wrestling
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In some shocking news, our very own Bunny Ears scientists have discovered evidence that upends a decades-long consensus about the origin of the phenomena known as RKOs (Random Kinetic Oscillations). RKOs, of course, are recorded events in which people are drawn towards the ground with both incredible and inexplicable force.

Due to the random nature of these events, scientists such as renowned physicist Michael Cole declared that these events came from “outta nowhere.” While 99.938% of all RKOs happen at wrestling events, the actual incidents are unpredictable.

After researching thousands of these instances, our team noticed a particle that is present just before and just after every RKO. We’ve dubbed this particle the Randy Orton Particle because of it’s vague resemblance to professional wrestler Randy Orton. Below are some images of the Randy Orton Particle taken just before RKO occurred.

Exhibit A:

Exhibit B:

We don’t know if the Randy Orton particle comes from outta nowhere, or if just the RKOs do, but one thing is clear: More testing is needed. 

The Bunny Ears scientists involved have had great successes in the last few decades. In 2008 they discovered the hardest part of the ring (the apron). In 2013 they uncovered a genetic abnormality known as “refereeism,” which makes a person pass out from getting slightly jostled. We may never uncover the true origin of the RKO, but this breakthrough discovery is a big step forward in understanding why people fall on their faces seemingly outta nowhere.

If you liked this, you’ll probably ALSO like Never-Before-Heard And Completely Mundane Tales Of Andre The Giant.

Images: WWE, WWE/YouTube/ Wikimedia


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