The Glass Skin Trend: My Adventures In Accidental Bloodletting
…Man Wakes Up From 10 Year Coma, Asks, “What’s Up With Lance Armstrong?”…
…Queen Kong???…
…AMBER ALERT: Spoon; Last seen running away with a Dish…
…God found dead in space…
…Teeth Found To Be Tongue Prison…
…Quiz: Do You Have A Savior Complex Or Are You Just Jesus?…
…Dog’s Feet Smell Like Vacuum Cleaner Bag…
…Christmas Scheduled to Happen Again This Year…
…Cancer and Death to marry… cigarettes devastated…
…Lindbergh baby missing…
…Corks Found To Only Be Holding Things Back…
…“Specialist” not a real designation…
…Entertainment personality ahead in the polls…
…Psychic Predicts World Already Over…
…Forks and outlets: you decide…
…AMBER ALERT: Tiffany Amber Thiessen…
…Roast Beef: Lunch Meat or Middle Toe? Little Piggies Respond…
…Supreme Court Rules: We Rule! …
…Newest Gaming Trend: Personal Space…
…BREAKING NEWS: Dumb Is Spelled With A ‘B’…
Cigarettes linked to cancer!
…Murder Victim Speaks Out…
…Waldo still missing…
…Hillary Clinton Still Roaming The Woods…
…Mannequins found in store window…
… Michael Jordan Comes Out Of Retirement To Dunk On Angela Merkel…
…Snow Is Just Rain That Forgot To Melt…
…Forever 21 Turns 34 this year…
…BitCoins Revealed To Be Pogs All Along…
…Medieval Times to get modern update…
…Quiz: Which 90s Murderer Are You?…
…”Peacoat” not what name suggests…
…Secret Ingredient To Sushi Discovered: FISH…
…San Francisco and Oakland make up; will become one city…
…Scientists find that Vaping is dope AF…
…Local Mom Still Talking About Tupperware…
Cancer linked to death!
… Red and Yellow Is The New Black…
…Colonel Sanders Found to Have Never Served in the Military…
…RIP KOKO…
…The Academy Awards ‘In Memoriam’ Forgets To Mention Macaulay Culkin For The Third Year In A Row…
…BREAKING NEWS: New Yorkers shocked to learn Staten Island isn’t part of New Jersey…
…Police Discover Two Bodies In Witch’s Oven…
…Trump Asks Media “What’s A Tariff?”…
…Tropic of Cancer sues Caribbean Medical Board for copyright infringement…
…Study finds that 9 out of 10 studies are for nerds…
…Quiz: Does He Know You’re Illiterate? …
…City Announces Subway Being Rebranded As “Uber Metro”…
…15 found dead in Warner Bros. Water Tower, at the Warner Movie lot…
…Thoughts and prayers found to be cancerous…
…BREAKING: Grandmother Not Actually As Proud Of You As She Says…
…Hats are cool…
…Ophthalmologist: Glasses Are Sexy…
…9 Out Of 10 Dentists Agree: Vacuums Suck…
…9 Out Of 10 Dentists Agree: Africa Is Not A Country…
…Four turtles and a rat found dead of toxic poisoning…
…AMBER ALERT: Amber Tamblyn…
…10 Out Of 10 Car Salesmen Agree, You Need A New Car…

I Misunderstood The Glass Skin Trend And Does Anyone Have A Tourniquet?

Glass Skin

I was so excited to try out this trend. I was skeptical at first. How could this possibly work? But several of my Insta friends have had amazing success. So, there had to be something to it, right? Still, the thought of mashing up glass and rubbing it all over my skin … What possible benefit could there be in doing so? My best guess was that the tiny shards of glass act as a natural exfoliant, getting down to the smooth, untouched layers of skin beneath the outer layers. However it works, it’s hard to argue with gorgeous, selfie-worthy results. So I worked up the courage and gave it my best shot.

Just Smash Up A Few Gravy Boats

Glass Skin

First, I had to find something glass to destroy. I settled on my collection of vitrified glass commemorative New Kids On The Block plates. Just the Jonathan one at first. I picked that sucker up and chucked it right at the wall. I have to tell you, it was the most satisfying moment of my entire life. I immediately needed to try it again … and there went Donnie.  Maybe I should have mentioned this earlier, but you’ll definitely want to be wearing shoes for this. I found myself running out of things to throw and resorted to hucking the toilet tank lid. I’m still randomly finding pieces of it around the house. I know, I know, not technically glass. But it was big and supposedly sturdy and you wouldn’t believe the rush I felt watching it explode in a million yellow pieces. I now have a new understanding of why this trend is so popular.

Stick Your Face Up In There

Glass Skin

After you’ve smashed up all your collectibles, grab a big handful of glass shards and just kind of smush it all up in your face. I have to be honest with you here, it hurts. A lot. But the glass adds a sort of shimmer to the skin that almost resembles glitter. So pretty. I was right to suspect the exfoliating nature of the glass. My dead skin peeled away in long, thin red strips, like the peeling of a ripe apple. Also, the healthy skin peeled away. Guess I got a little carried away. If you’re like me, you may start to feel a little woozy. Keep some juice and cookies on hand … and something to clean up the blood. I used some old washcloths and the ugly sweater Evan gave me for my birthday last year. No, I will not be paying to dry clean that, sorry Evan.

Remove The Glass From Your Face

Glass Skin

I suppose you could just leave it in, but would you want to? Feel free to experiment with extraction methods. But speaking from experience I can tell you tweezers are basically useless here. They just kept slipping off the blood. I tried to have my friend Haley just pull some of the larger pieces out but she wouldn’t stop gagging and then started crying about how I know she’s terrified of blood and why would I do this to her and then she passed out. Lame, Haley. Lame. I found absorbing the shards in white bread really did the trick.

Make This A Part Of Your Daily Beauty Routine

Glass Skin

I’ve tried the glass skin beauty routine a few times now and I can say with certainty it never gets any easier. The adrenaline rush from the glass breaking tends to fade with time, too. I’ve been buying more and more rare and expensive items to destroy just to get that feeling back. I’ve modified my makeup budget to make up for it. My face is permanently red now so all the money I would be spending on blush has been going toward building my collection $500 Boys II Men cereal bowls. Nathan will be the first to go.

Carolyn Burke
Carolyn Burke

Author - Friendly Neighborhood Murder Ghost

Carolyn was just an average kid until a freak sledding accident caused her to drown in a summer camp lake. She has been writing for various websites, including Cracked.com and ScreenRant.com from beyond the grave for over four years. Every hundred years or so she is allowed to return to Earth to hack up teenagers and attend middle school dances ... not always at the same time.

No Comments Yet

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published.