Podcast Episode 18 – The Return of Q&A (Annotated)
Hi, I’m Craig The Intern, and they make me transcribe these every week. Everything’s going great so far! Any questions?
It’s question and answer day, and the guys hope nobody will sue them for any reason! Now that the shows been going a while, and both hosts have social media, they thought it was time to do one of these again, since the last time they did it, it was to maybe eight mutual friends. This time the first question is a marriage proposal for Mack, and he nicely says maybe, but probably not. A question about cults leads Mack and Matt to determine their cult would involve having fun all the time and burning effigies; this turns into a long side tangent about other cults they don’t want to be, and Irish wrestling fans who stand up straight.
Matt has never heard a Mars Volta song in his life.
The guys talk about assembling zombie apocalypse celebrity friends, and come to the conclusion that among others, Ted Nugent would be useful, and also WWE’s The Big Show. And we learn which Culkin brother has the best zombie plan. Meanwhile, Mack has apparently used Twitter to challenge WWE superstar Rusev to a fight. Will it be Mack Day every day before long?
What news events would “break the Internet?” Some say alien invaders, while others (like our hosts) think a talking raccoon would do the trick. Or Toy Story coming to life. Basically, anything talking that isn’t supposed to, like the presidents on your money.
It’s long overdue, but they figure out how to do a Pagemaster-based drinking game. And what the differences are between Preacher, Priest, Legion, and Dogma.
Favorite comics, favorite era of SNL, favorite fan mail Mack received as a kid (he didn’t have time to read any), and favorite wrestlers (Ultimate Warrior, Rock ‘n’ Sock) are discussed, and then Matt reveals he has three cases of expired Ecto-Cooler. This brings up other canceled drinks, like Snapple Rain, which was clear and agave flavored; Bali Blast, which got changed after a terrorist attack; and Crystal Pepsi, of course. There’s a weird question about what animal you would make horse-sized if you could. And an even weirder one about cloning centers. Meanwhile, Matt remembers recording a commentary track for Stand By Me without ever having seen it before, and how it and The Monster Squad have certain slang words that haven’t aged too well.
Mack debunks a popular rumor about him being on French radio talking about Hollywood producers killing children and turning them into shoes. Sorry everyone.
The guys talk about Demolition Man and the Die Hard movies for a bit, then compare White House Down to Olympus Has Fallen. Nobody asks their favorite Mortal Kombat characters, but they answer anyway. Mack would be Grape Nuts if he could be any cereal, because nobody would eat it. Matt would be an expired box of Mr. T cereal. And that would make a good Black Mirror episode.
Are there plans to film the podcast? Absolutely. Will you like what you see? We do not know.
1:22-2:10 If Howard Hughes had a podcast, what would it be like?
2:42-4:15 All the reasons Mack has been sued in his life.
12:49-18:16 What celebrity friends would be on their team in the zombie apocalypse?
21:09-23:21 How to throw the perfect Pagemaster-themed party (and drinking game).
32:11-32:35 The guys do a commercial for prunes.
40:56-43:22 Matt describes his favorite Mark Twain nonfiction book
The Mars Volta won a Grammy for this song. Listen to it and you’ll be one up on Matt:
Preacher is a comic by Garth Ennis that became an AMC TV show. Priest is a post-apocalyptic vampire movie with paul Bettany. Legion is an apocalypse movie that also stars Paul Bettany. Dogma is a Kevin Smith comedy that shares Preacher‘s basic storyline of a road trip to look for God. Now you know.
Ecto-Cooler was a Ghostbusters-themed flavor of Hi-C that got briefly revived for the movie remake:
You can order Matt’s favorite Mark Twain book here.
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Image: 20th Century Fox