Ghosts Have Rights: Stop Ghost Hunting NOW!
We’re here to talk about a very important issue: ghost rights. In case you haven’t noticed, the spirits of the dead are forever being chased, studied, and documented, without so much as a consent form in sight. Not to mention that the entire ghost-hunting enterprise runs on the gross violation of ghost privacy, nor the fact that ghosts have zero legal protections within our current legal system (especially when it comes to property rights). This is why we’re officially calling for the total ban of ghost hunting. Stop ghost hunting NOW. You’ll thank us when you’re dead.
It’s So Disrespectful
As it currently stands, ghost hunting is a completely unregulated industry and there aren’t any state or federally-recognized certification programs. Your 12-year-old cousin could buy an EMF detector and a Ouija board and call himself a professional (and he has). This blatant disrespect for the entities of the spirit world has gone on long enough. They deserve more and they deserve to be left alone.
End the Hysteria
We’re well aware that many ghost hunters claim they’re providing an important and necessary service; namely, bestowing emotional “closure” on the living. But come on—we all know that’s what therapists and yelling at tombstones are for. These “Good Samaritans” also conveniently fail to mention that most people hunt ghosts for either sport or profit.
So please, join us in the fight for ghost rights, and let’s make ghost hunting a thing of the past. Do you really want to look back and tell your children, and your children’s children, that you stood by and did nothing during this spooktacular crisis? And do you also want to risk getting trapped in some kind of magic amulet or something for the rest of eternity some day because some amateur ghost hunter with zero training doesn’t know what the fuck he’s doing? We didn’t think so.