A Shopping Guide to the Cupertino Square Mall
Hey Shopaholics! I’ve just gotten back from scoping out the Cupertino Square Mall in sunny Cupertino, CA, and I’ve got some great tips for you. The Cupertino Square Mall opened in 1976, it’s three stories, and has enough space to house almost 200 retail stores. Here’s a shopping guide for any shoppers looking for a […]
I Made A Raccoon My Life Coach And I’ve Never Been Happier
Rummage through the trash of life and find your true self!
Life Lessons I Learned From The Feral Children Living In The Woods Behind My Home
As a trendsetter, you grow accustomed to learning new things in surprising places. I wouldn’t be the daring style icon I am today if I weren’t ready to adopt fashion ideas from, say, nature, or unexpected encounters with people below my income bracket, or even the various diverse cultures that my ancestors helped to oppress. […]
Recipes For Boogers Since That’s The Only Thing My Gross Kids Will Eat
At your wit’s end with your kids eating their boogers instead of your delicious homemade meals?
Grow Your Pubes Now For This Year’s Coziest Winter Blanket—Here’s How
Use your pubes as nature intended!
Mother’s Day Gift Ideas For People You’ve Accidentally Called ‘Mom’
Mother’s Day shouldn’t just be about the woman who actually gave birth to you. What’s wrong with honoring all the people you accidentally called “Mom?”
Summer Staples We Don’t Recommend You Stick Up Your Butt (This Time)
We’re saying ‘yes’ to summer and ‘no more’ to your lawsuits!
I No Longer Believe In Cage-Free Zoos Now That My Family Is Dead
The hyena ambush really sealed the deal.
Way Too Formal Breakfasts For After Casual Sex
I have always considered myself a sex-positive woman. I have needs, and I’m not afraid to admit it. But that doesn’t mean I don’t treat my (extremely casual, no strings-attached) partner, Liam, with dignity and kindness. We might not be a couple (which again, I’m 100% okay with), but I don’t ever want him to […]
Fun First Date Conversations That Are Exclusively Die Hard Quotes
Whip out these Die Hard quotes on your first date and you are sure to be as cool as Mr. McClane himself.
How To Talk About The Books You Only Bought Because They’re Pretty
Use words like ‘imagery’ and ‘prose.’
My Morning Routine: I Lick Everything In The House So It Stays Mine
When you grow up in a house with seven brothers, you learn certain habits that last a lifetime.
Become An Organizational Wizard By Asking Actual Wizards For Help
They mostly told us to optimize vertical space?
Serene Bottomless Pits To Visit This Summer
You’ll want to stare into these bottomless, lonely cavities for the rest of your life.
Tackle Little Tasks So You Can Focus On The Big, Haunting Problems
Like, “What am I even doing with my life?”
Chrissy Teigen Is The Anti-Gwyneth, So I Guess We Have To Eat Her
How else shall we absorb her powers?
Finding the Perfect Vape Flavor To Pair With Your Glaring Personality Flaws
Looking to start vaping? Our team of experts will guide you into finding a flavor that nicely complements your inability to grow up.
Even We’re Not Dumb Enough To Put Ginger Up Our Butts
We’ve got the ‘sticking stuff up your butt’ beat covered, thanks.
Deep Breathing Exercises For When Your Home Is Getting Robbed Right Now
Don’t let the stress of a home invasion get to you.
6 Bathrobes Perfect For Doing Coked-Up Naked Karate
Have you ever felt just a little TOO nude while doing naked karate?
The Hottest New Look Is Bleaching Then Tie-Dying Your Butthole
Bleaching your butthole is out. Bleaching then TIE-DYING your butthole is very in.
The Best Ribbon Dances To Apologize For Running Over Your Neighbor’s Pet
Nothing says ‘sorry’ like a ribbon dance!
Demand Satisfaction At The Office By Challenging Coworkers To Duels
Interoffice politics need not be complicated.