Get The Look: The Night King
The movers and shakers are going nuts for the evil overlord of Westeros and his unique Night King look, and it’s not hard to see why. With his adventurous hair, warrior-inspired fashion, and flawless nails, it’s a real Mad Max In Manhattan situation. You need to get your piece of it, and the clock is ticking on this trend for reasons that we won’t explain in case you haven’t seen Sunday’s episode but clicked on an article about Game of Thrones anyway for some reason, so let’s dive in.
Undeath Is No Excuse To Neglect Your Nails
He knows that, and you need to learn it. A full set of almond-shaped, transparent, icy-blue acrylics says “Genocide doesn’t have to be incompatible with a regular salon schedule.”
Shave That Hair
Leave only tufts here and there that can be bleached and twisted into points like that guy from The Prodigy. (R.I.P.)
Consider Getting Food Poisoning
You’ll have a deathly glow in no time. Make sure to wear your sunscreen, too. You want a sickly grey Night King look, and sun damage is the antithesis of that. If all else fails, some silvery highlighter never hurt anyone.
Radioactive Blue Eyes
No matter what shade nature has bestowed upon your face orbs, you’re gonna need colored contacts. That shit needs to glow in the dark, so look for Day-Glo ones. That seems like it wouldn’t be great for your eyes, but we didn’t research it because we don’t care. Who needs sight when you can locate enemies by magical touch?
Scavenge Armor From The Art And Architecture Of a Forgotten Far-North Culture
This will, admittedly, be difficult.
Drastically Lower The Lighting Of Every Room You Enter
This will not only make you look scarier and more cinematic, it will nicely offset your glowing eyes and silver highlighter. It’ll help you sneak up on people, too. Once their heart rate returns to normal, it’ll go up again when they realize they’ve been attacked by the shimmeriest, most fuckable zombie.
Avoid Assassin Child-Women
No spoilers, but trust us on this one. You’re going for “undead,” not “dead dead.”
Katie Goldin’s Golden Rules
Weekly comics from the mind of Bunny Ears writer Katie Goldin. They're weird, they're funny, and they're always so pretty! The Goldin Rules…