bunnyears

…Unusually Buff Dog Not Breaking Eye Contact…
…Santa is real, and he lives in your crawl space….
…6 Year Online Romance Ends In Weird Handshake…
…Spoiler alert: The milk has gone bad…
…Local white guy “gets it”…
…Woman Memorizes Snapple Fact In Case Tonight’s Party Is That Bad…
…Report reveals Rice-A-Roni actually from Detroit…
…Help, I’m Trapped In A Headline Writing Factory. Details To Follow…
…Survey finds startling amount of ghosts are racist….
…Opinion: I Have The Best Smile And Coolest Personality …
…Violent Pokémon dispute sparks trade war…
…Drugs In Water Supply Treat Fish’s Depression…
…Did Tupac fake his birth?…
…Update: Only very tiny hats now cool…
…Scientists Discover A Lot Of Cool Junk In Older Brother’s Room…
…Bunny Ears wins prestigious Bunny Ears website of the year award at the Bunny Ears Awards…
…Study: Loss Of Car Leads To 1000% Catcalling Increase…
…13th month discovered between February and March….
…Mother Struggles To Explain Scott Baio To Her Child…
…Millennials Are Disrupting The Banjo Industry…
…A New Generation Of Turtles Are Learning Martial Arts…
…According to studies accordions are unsteady…
…Am I standing right behind you? The answer might surprise you!…
…Dollars to donuts exchange crashing…
…Chill Girlfriend Constantly Suppressing Everything…
…Reported discovery of new planet turns out to be your mom…
…Adult Hearing Mom Use Their Full Name Still Terrified…
…Very smart toilet begs for death…
…Against All Odds, Man Learns To Dance…
…Sugar daddy eaten by ants…
…Single Woman Manages To Meet Food Delivery Minimum…
…Email From Mom Has 4 FWDs In Subject Line…
…Big dick energy drink selling poorly…
…’Glow Up’ Discovered To Just Be DBZ Reference…
…Your Dog Might Have A Secret Passport…
…Children May Be Stupider And Weaker Than Previously Thought…
…Research shows laughter definitely not the best medicine…
…Hurricane wipes out town of Duckberg…
…Single 32 Year Old Patiently Waits For Friends To Get Divorced…
…Half The World’s Bees Have Never Seen The Show Seinfeld…
…Woman With Scoliosis Has Detailed Knowledge Of Floor-…
…Fourth grade teacher found to be not as hot as you remember…
…Quiz: Is This The Good Milk?…
…Local Couple Adopts Blind Dogs And Just Puts Them Down…
…Don’t Forget To Grab Milk…
…Breaking: Absolutely no one wang chunging tonight…
…According to studies studying causes cancer…
…New Boyfriend Eats Imitation Crab Straight From The Package…
…Opinion: We’re In A Golden Age Of Trash Talking…
…Man pretty sure Game Of Thrones is historically accurate…
…Breaking – There’s A Spider In Your Pocket…
…Scientists find that deja vu is just alternate timeline of you dying…
…Confirmed: Everyone is hanging out without you…
…Man discovers woman already knows thing he was going to tell her….
…Shazaam not a real movie…Google it…
… Michael Jordan Comes Out Of Retirement To Dunk On Angela Merkel…
…Hospital Cracks Down On Patients Getting Chemo For Fun…
…Gordon Ramsay Signed Beef Wellington Sells For 1.6 Million…

There Was A Mini Friends Reunion In My Latest Restraining Order

Oh my god, you guys, things are really starting to look up for me! I was pretty sure I got Chandler, but when Joey showed up in my latest restraining order, I knew it was official. I have a mini–Friends reunion on my hands.

As we all know, whenever more than one former Friends cast member enters the same room, it is a mini–Friends reunion and must be reported as such by every U.S. news outlet even though there are six friends and they all live in the same town. Also, they were colleagues for 10 years, so they probably bonded and still want to see each other once in a while. Still, we are definitely doing the right thing by keeping a record of these historic interactions. I personally am doing the right thing by getting several of them in this courthouse today.

Lady Justice may be blind, but that doesn’t mean she hasn’t seen every episode of Friends.

I’m so psyched! I’ve been following the Friends for years. I followed Jennifer Aniston to the Academy Awards and Matthew Perry to an IHOP. I followed Lisa Kudrow to one of the nicest salons in L.A. and Matthew Perry to another IHOP. That guy really likes IHOP.

What should I wear on this momentous occasion that will definitely be covered by TMZ, E! News, and People magazine? Oh, that’s right—I have to wear an orange jump suit. Well, maybe I can snazz it up by duct taping a lock of Lisa Kudrow’s hair to it. Or does that make me look too thirsty?

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God, I’m just so lucky. I can’t believe I get to experience a real mini–Friends reunion. I think my favorite so far—and believe me, it’s hard to pick just one—was the time Maggie Wheeler and Matthew Perry both got arrested at a Lakers game. She kept putting her butt on stuff, and he tried to sneak in a whole bunch of pancakes. When they both got booked in that cute little Lakers jail, there were three gossip columnists there waiting for them.

Oh, there was also the time that Courtney Cox got attacked by Katie (the monkey that played Marcel) on a red carpet for the Animal Planet awards. I was like “Aaaahhh, mini–Friends reunion!” Everyone else was like “Aaaahhh, we should probably help Courtney Cox, she’s super bleeding a lot.”

I hate to see two strong women fight like that.

Maybe my mini–Friends reunion will be someone else’s favorite, but honestly, I can’t take all the credit. I wasn’t even trying to stalk Matt LeBlanc—I was just trying to avoid David Schwimmer. He found out I was stalking the other Friends, and he started calling me all the time like “Hey, why aren’t you stalking me?” He just got really clingy, and it was a little unsettling, you know? Like, I’m sorry, I love Friends, but no one wants to stalk you, Dave. I just so happened to run into Matt Leblanc when I was running away from David Schwimmer, and I kind of forgot what I was doing and just yelled “GIVE ME YOUR HAIR.”

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So that’s how I got where I am today. Where I am today is, of course, the happiest I’ve ever been at the center of my very own court-mandated front row seat for a mini–Friends reunion.

Images: Warner Bros. Television, Pixabay, Pexels

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