Try This Healthy Popcorn Alternative: PopKorn!
Does your willpower go out the window when you catch a whiff of a fresh batch of popcorn? Unfortunately, most store-bought brands are high in calories, carbs, and sodium. Yuck. If you and popcorn are meant to be, we’re here to tell you about the carb-free, healthful alternative: PopKorn.
It Comes in Multiple Flavors
PopKorn has three unique flavors: Fieldy, Munky, and Head. Each one has its own special properties and health benefits. “Fieldy” helps with joint problems and flexibility; exactly 20 minutes after you consume it your body will slide into a squatting bass position. “Munky” tastes like leftover lint from a janitor’s uniform and is full of fiber. “Head” tastes like betrayal.
Fun Popping Sounds!
The special corn variety from which PopKorn is made grows in a field that is serenaded by the beautiful and soothing sounds of bagpipes each and every morning. The notes seep into the kernels and can be heard instead of popping. It both baffles and amazes modern science.
No Risk of Popcorn Lung
We all know that popcorn causes bronchiolitis obliterans (popcorn lung). It’s both a painful and dangerous condition. However, PopKorn is only popped with fresh air from Jonathan Davis’s very own oxygen tank (it’s a thing), ensuring a safe and restorative eating experience.
Kids Can (and Should!) Eat It, Too
PopKorn was initially tested on a focus group of 100 five-year-olds who ate PopKorn every day for a year. Scientists found that every single one of those kids grew up to not be posers. It’s a win-win situation for parents and kids alike!
Sometimes an alternative cannot take the place. But we promise, sometimes it’s the difference you can’t taste. It’s so good I cannot feel my face. You’ll never see PopKorn fall from grace. It is so yummy it’ll have you going, “Da boom na da noom na namena.”
Images: Flickr/mzagerp, Orville Redenbacher