The Best Jokes To Help Deflect Judgement When You’re An Adult Buying Lunchables
Like, “Hey — how did THESE get in here?”
The Best Cakes To Smash Into Your Face When Trying To Fool A Social Worker
Keep this insane ruse going just a little longer!
A Handy Recipe For Homemade Adderall
Save yourself some money (and a visit with your “guy”) by making your own Adderall at home. Now FOCUS.
A Simple Guide To Wines So You Don’t Look Like A Caveman At Dinner
Avoid humiliation, you giant barbarian.
Healthy Twists On Picnic Favorites Literally No One Wants You To Make
Have you tried apple slices and cinnamon?!
Our Marshmallow Diet Lets You Camp In The Woods For Weeks Without Pooping!
Marshmallows are basically nature’s intestinal glue.
Try Our Low Carb Pasta Alternative: Betty Spaghetty
It’s both delicious, nutritious, and not a choking hazard if eaten correctly.
Recipes For Boogers Since That’s The Only Thing My Gross Kids Will Eat
At your wit’s end with your kids eating their boogers instead of your delicious homemade meals?
These Trendy Salads Were Recalled But Oh God We’re Gonna Eat Them Anyway
The hottest new salad proteins are hopefully maggots, because that’s definitely what’s in this trendy salad pack we bought three weeks ago!
Savory Ice Cream Flavors Created by Some Monster
Check out our reviews of these actual savory ice cream flavors apparently made by demon aliens who want to ruin everything you love in this world.
The Best Flavored Coffees to Throw in Your Boss’s Face When You Quit
You wanna throw coffee in your boss’s face but it has to be the right kind because you are above all, professional.
Great Ways To Sneak In Some Day Drinking This Mother’s Day
Drinking on Mother’s Day won’t help your partner and children truly appreciate you, but it WILL get you through another day without murder charges!
If You Ate Those Charcoal Ice Cream Cones You Now Have 24 Hours to Live
We were first to tell you to try charcoal ice cream cones, so let us also be the first to add some unfortunate news!
Lose 20 Friends with These 30-Minute Workouts
Want to makeover not just your body but your whole dang life?
Jackfruit Is The Vegan Alternative To Dog Meat You’ve Been Waiting For
Look, we get it. There’s no need to preach to us about how good dog meat can be, and finding a healthy, delicious, vegan alternative can be difficult. Enter jackfruit, a freaky-looking, spiky fruit native to the tropical lowlands of Southeast Asia. Its meaty texture and neutral flavor will leave you amazed that you’re not […]
5 Recipes To Impress No One Because You Don’t Need To, You’re Perfect
Minimum effort with maximum reminders that you’re great and everyone else can suck it.
The Real Nutritional Supplement Was Inside You All Along
But how did I get regular after taking the supplements when I was so constipated before, you ask? Guess what. That was also you. Your poops were stuck inside your colon waiting for you to believe in yourself.
I Support Wildlife Preservation So I Can Eat The Last Of Every Animal
Yes, even the cute ones. Especially the cute ones. Mmmmm delicious wildlife preservation.