Where Are They Now: Triple H’s Long Hair

Triple H fans know that Hunter Hearst Helmsley’s long, flowing hair dazzled the wrestling world from the very first moment he appeared on WWF television. We followed his luscious mane for the next two decades, from the well-maintained hair of an East-Coast blue blood, to the tattered locks of “The Game” … that is until 2012, when the hair vanished without a trace. So, what happened to Triple H’s long hair? Was it trimmed to a shorter, more professional ‘do to match his new job as a top WWE executive? Did he tap out after losing a bout to male pattern baldness, much like his friend HBK? Did he just get tired of catching his long hair in car doors and closed windows?

To find the truth, we went straight to the source: Triple H’s long hair itself. We found it in a place you wouldn’t suspect: on the back of a horse.

But Why?

“Triple H’s hair was an iconic part of the wrestling world for about 20 years, and it just needed a change of scenery I guess,” said Dr. John Byron, owner of America’s number one human-to-horse hair transplant clinic. Now, Triple H’s hair spends its days attached to the tails of three different purebred ponies, galloping the fields of western Maine. Gone are the days of absorbing Triple H’s blood and sweat; now, the only blood Triple H’s hair touches is the blood of mosquitoes that find themselves in whipping range of the horses’ long blond tails. And Triple H’s hair isn’t alone. Dr. Byron has also transplanted the long hair of Baron Corbin onto the back of several mustangs.

So every time you see Triple H inside the squared circle, pour one out for his long, elegant mane. Which, again, has now been surgically attached to not one, but several horses.

Image: WWE