Writer/Comedienne/Lady King who has written for Reductress, McSweeneys, CollegeHumor, The Belladonnas, and Smosh
New Orleans celebrates Mardi Gras the two weeks before Shrove Tuesday, which is … when?
Because therapy is expensive.
If you breed your children, you’re literally worse than a hypothetical love child made from the union of Hitler and Stalin, who was then was nannied by Pol Pot.
Mack and Devon finally end their feud… or do they? A special surprise for Devon digs up the buried hatchet.
Like the say in business school, “Don’t blow your money. Let your money blow you.”
If you’re in Vegas, you’re going to end up with the body of a dead hooker – either accidentally or on purpose, so it’s best to plan ahead!
Sure. Just google what’s in ras el hanout and blend together whatever shit you have in your spice rack.
It’s not just that I really wanna soak him in my pee.
Your vacation won’t be relaxing if you have to scream, “I want water! Water. WATER. WAAAT-ERR!” every time you’re thirsty.
You’re not cheating. You’re simply engaging in sexual acts with people outside your marriage without telling your partner about it. And that’s different. There’s a different label on it. And a book. And a website. So it’s fine.
Think about a heavy coat and also goggles.
Nothing says, “I don’t want to lose you, but I also don’t want to lose my marriage” like vaguely-Asian pot stickers.
But how did I get regular after taking the supplements when I was so constipated before, you ask? Guess what. That was also you. Your poops were stuck inside your colon waiting for you to believe in yourself.
Stop treating your A-hole like your B-hole.
Have you met Bacillus Subtilis?
It’s not okay to go on vacation and have an affair. We should have known that. That’s on us. But also, you should have known not to take that advice, so that’s on you, too.
