Bunny Ears Podcast: Vim And Vigor: What Does It Mean To Be Healthy?
…“Specialist” not a real designation…
…Mannequins found in store window…
…Cancer and Death to marry… cigarettes devastated…
…Scientists find that Vaping is dope AF…
…Corks Found To Only Be Holding Things Back…
…Waldo still missing…
…Murder Victim Speaks Out…
…Quiz: Do You Have A Savior Complex Or Are You Just Jesus?…
…The Academy Awards ‘In Memoriam’ Forgets To Mention Macaulay Culkin For The Third Year In A Row…
…RIP KOKO…
…BREAKING: Grandmother Not Actually As Proud Of You As She Says…
…Queen Kong???…
…Christmas Scheduled to Happen Again This Year…
Cigarettes linked to cancer!
…9 Out Of 10 Dentists Agree: Africa Is Not A Country…
…Ophthalmologist: Glasses Are Sexy…
…Forever 21 Turns 34 this year…
…Forks and outlets: you decide…
…Entertainment personality ahead in the polls…
…Supreme Court Rules: We Rule! …
…Quiz: Which 90s Murderer Are You?…
…AMBER ALERT: Spoon; Last seen running away with a Dish…
…15 found dead in Warner Bros. Water Tower, at the Warner Movie lot…
…Colonel Sanders Found to Have Never Served in the Military…
…AMBER ALERT: Amber Tamblyn…
…Roast Beef: Lunch Meat or Middle Toe? Little Piggies Respond…
…Psychic Predicts World Already Over…
…BREAKING NEWS: New Yorkers shocked to learn Staten Island isn’t part of New Jersey…
Cancer linked to death!
…Thoughts and prayers found to be cancerous…
…Local Mom Still Talking About Tupperware…
…10 Out Of 10 Car Salesmen Agree, You Need A New Car…
…Police Discover Two Bodies In Witch’s Oven…
… Red and Yellow Is The New Black…
…City Announces Subway Being Rebranded As “Uber Metro”…
…Medieval Times to get modern update…
…AMBER ALERT: Tiffany Amber Thiessen…
…Trump Asks Media “What’s A Tariff?”…
…Teeth Found To Be Tongue Prison…
…Secret Ingredient To Sushi Discovered: FISH…
…Hats are cool…
…BitCoins Revealed To Be Pogs All Along…
… Michael Jordan Comes Out Of Retirement To Dunk On Angela Merkel…
…Study finds that 9 out of 10 studies are for nerds…
…Man Wakes Up From 10 Year Coma, Asks, “What’s Up With Lance Armstrong?”…
…Newest Gaming Trend: Personal Space…
…9 Out Of 10 Dentists Agree: Vacuums Suck…
…Lindbergh baby missing…
…Tropic of Cancer sues Caribbean Medical Board for copyright infringement…
…Four turtles and a rat found dead of toxic poisoning…
…San Francisco and Oakland make up; will become one city…
…BREAKING NEWS: Dumb Is Spelled With A ‘B’…
…God found dead in space…
…Dog’s Feet Smell Like Vacuum Cleaner Bag…
…”Peacoat” not what name suggests…
…Hillary Clinton Still Roaming The Woods…
…Snow Is Just Rain That Forgot To Melt…
…Quiz: Does He Know You’re Illiterate? …

Podcast Episode 27 – Vim & Vigor (Annotated)

health and well-being

Hi, I’m Craig The Intern, and they make me transcribe these every week. Everything’s going great so far! How’s your health?

The Lowdown:
Since BunnyEars.com is all about health and well-being, it’s about time we had a podcast on the topic, and it kicks off as Matt and Mack drink a shot and toast each other’s health.

Matt’s friends are all having problems sleeping, and Mack gets up about five times every night, which is apparently bad for you because you don’t get a REM state going. Both need noise to fall asleep, and for Mack it’s usually a YouTube video longer than 20 minutes. It was at one point books on tape through headphones when his girlfriend didn’t like the noise, but he nearly choked himself on the cord. Shoutout to Bill Bryson, whose A Short History of Nearly Everything is 28 hours or so unabridged. Matt leaves podcasts running all night, but if he has trouble falling asleep he mentally designs theme parks. Mack plays Halo in his head, and apparently makes pew-pew-pew sounds in his sleep as a result.

Matt talks about disturbing dreams, which his therapist deftly pegged to his falling asleep to true crime podcasts. Mack has recently had his stomach scoped and a colonoscopy, and two ulcers were found. He’s now been told to smoke and drink less; it seems everything that can cause ulcers is a thing that he does. Neither of our hosts has ever broken a bone, though Matt did knock out his two front teeth once, falling on his face after huffing computer cleaner. His excuse was that he tripped while playing Game Boy, which everyone believed. Maybe because they wanted to.

Mack talks about having toxoplasmosis when he was 20 – a single-celled blood parasite that he received from undercooked lamb, which took two months to get better from, and the medications were worse than the illness. Matt’s equivalent was having alcohol poisoning when he was 15. Mack backs off a bit on the “no broken bones” thing when he suspects he may have broken his toe. They talk about all the sports they played, and still marvel they haven’t broken more. Matt has had concussions, however.

An account of Matt bear-hugging a mascot who turned out to be a scared 14 year-old girl leads into discussions of mascot costumes and how theme park performers sometimes have fans inside their suits. Also, it turns out horror maze performers get graded on a scare quota, and Matt says he’d find Elmo pretty scary in a horror maze.

Mack brings the conversation back to concussions, which he says he deserved every time, like one time he tried to do a legdrop from a ladder, and bounced off the mattress onto his head. Matt recalls taking bumps and feeling like he had strep the next day, and Mack expresses a fondness for moonsaults into the pool, one of which busted his head open.

Mental health is the next topic. Mack hasn’t been to therapy since he was very young, but occasionally self-medicated with Xanax. Matt was on Ritalin at age 4, and added a bunch of antidepressants in his teen years, which he then weaned off of completely. They agree that life sucks, which is why so many people are on antidepressants.

Time for a new segment where we guess what’s in Mack’s backpack! [SPOILER: a statue of Jesus teaching karate.]

Back to talking about Matt’s school days. He was the most disruptive kid that ever existed in the history of the world, an ultimately realized school was not the right environment for him. Neither he nor Mack went to college, and they have this cool podcast now, so…

At what age do you realize your health matters and being unhealthy isn’t cute? Both the guys say your thirties are the beginning of it. They compare weird aches and wrinkles, and how they tapered off a two-pack-a-day smoking habit, and do vaping now. But Matt will only do the flavor designed to mimic Newport cigarettes. Neither are big drinkers; Matt because he has had alcohol poisoning five times. They think it’s fun to abstain.

Yoga is something Matt loves now, and he does it in a sauna. It’s the only thing that calms his hyper nature down because it’s a really hard workout. Though the occasional celebrity or porn star in his class is sometimes distracting, he admits. He also hikes, and makes it more fun by pretending werewolves are chasing him. Mack describes a Rocky IV-style DIY workout he does. Matt again sing the praises of abstaining from things because it feels mature. Neither likes doing risky stuff like kayaking and skiing, but we understand Stewart P. Miller of Columbus, Ohio feels differently.

The conversation detours into the idea of dying at home, and Whitney Houston and Prince come up. Mack takes the opportunity to squash the heavy drug rumors about himself, but he does tell a funny story about the time he actually saw crack in person, when his pal “Laef” bought a rock of it from their weed dealer and carried it around in his backpack for two years.

We close with a warning to see the doctor and get checked up, because Mack had to recover from twisted vertebrae and two ulcers. Matt compares him to Brock Lesnar, but mixes up trichinosis with diverticulitis. Everyone needs a balance in life, and super-healthy lifestyles suck and are really hard. But do something healthy, and also get colonoscopies.

The first listener voicemail at the end is Stew complaining.

The Highlights:

12:33-15:00 Matt’s huffing whippits and fainting and messing up his face adventure.

20:48-21:32 Matt tries to hug a mascot; chaos ensues

22:49-25:00 Mack gets a concussion from a backyard wrestling move.

54:00-55:40 How Mack has seen crack, in a story that’s not whack.

The Links:

-The audio book of Bill Bryson’s A Short History of Nearly Everything is free with a trial subscription to Audible.

-Here’s where you can find Hot Yoga classes in Los Angeles.

Brock Lesnar is a professional wrestler and MMA fighter whose career was briefly sidelined due to diverticulitis, which is a build-up of skin pouches along the colon. Trichinosis is an infection caused by parasites often found in undercooked pork. Mack’s toxoplasmosis is closer to the latter.

-Crack is bad. Pee-wee Herman says so:

Contact The Guys!

Email: [email protected]
Twitter: @bunnyearspod
Instagram: @bunnyearspodcast
Telephone: 845-EZE-HOAX

Mack
Twitter @IncredibleCulk
Instagram: Culkamania

Matt Cohen
Twitter: @Cameltoad
Instagram: @Cameltoad

Image: Flickr/diggboston/em>

Craig, the Intern
Craig, the Intern

Intern

I'm the intern here at Bunny Ears. Say hi!

4 Comments
  1. Oh my gosh, you guys found THAT AD! Lol Now you’re gonna go down a whole darn RABBIT HOLE (haha) of Safety PSAs/PIFs!

  2. You guys have to check out meth. After a few days of uninterrupted vigorous and spontaneous activity, you sleep like a baby! Also, my tummy is flat as a board. Never been fitter.

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