Tag Archives: health

The world is in bad shape. Politics are a virtual minefield. The weather is devastatingly out of control. And hey, did you know the honeybees are still dying? Still, guys. Look, I know what you’re thinking. “I’m allergic to bees, bees killed Macaulay Culkin, and peanut butter is better than honey anyway.” Fair. I’m impressed […]

If you’re anything like me, once a year you, your vagina, and your freshly bleached asshole find yourselves spread-eagle at the OBGYN for a good old pap smear. I dunno, just something quirky I do to keep things interesting! And if you’re anything more like me, that means once a year you have to put […]

Hi, I’m Craig The Intern, and they make me transcribe these every week. Everything’s going great so far! How’s your health? The Lowdown: Since BunnyEars.com is all about health and well-being, it’s about time we had a podcast on the topic, and it kicks off as Matt and Mack drink a shot and toast each […]

We’ve come a long way as a society as far as accepting that bodily perfection, ideally in terms of delicious food items you won’t be allowed to eat, is a requirement for personhood. In 2013, we first admitted that if you don’t have a thigh gap, you’re a garbage human. More recently, it was the […]

First of all, we here at Bunny Ears would like to say we are SO SORRY for our article about chic summer boots. The men in our office keep the thermostat at a reasonable 40 degrees, so we were unaware of the harm our article about sexy summer boots seems to have caused. Also, we […]

I’ve been to the bottom, man. Last night was the fourth straight evening I spent catching z’s in my vehicle. Granted, it’s happened to the best of us, especially us common folk who refuse handouts and breadcrumbs from the 1%. But it’s hard to see the light at the end of the tunnel when you’ve […]

Anxious about yoga? Me too. Luckily, I figured out a way to combine my best habit with my worst one! Here are some toenail biting stretches you need in your life: The Tentative Dreamer: The Nasty Gazelle: The Aspirational Mouth: Love’s Tender Kiss:

Unhealthy food understands it’s our prey, so it releases toxic sugars and fats into our bodies as a self-defense mechanism when we eat. But it doesn’t have to be this way. For so long, diets have unfairly disparaged unhealthy food without taking a second to consider whether our cakes and fries would harm us if […]

For some people, health scares, tragedies, or life-changing experiences are the last straw before we take the initiative to better our personal health. However, the rest of us all know that the key to living healthier than ever is paved with the fear of assassination from your evil future self. Whether they’re trying to take […]

I used to be so disappointed when I saw myself in the mirror first thing in the morning. Did time, stress, sleeplessness, parenthood, and all of those speedballs I did in my twenties conspire to ruin the beauty that got me invited to all those secret ritualistic orgies? Yes. Yes, they had. But that all changed […]

As the resident environmentalist at Bunny Ears, it should be no surprise to anyone that I’m absolutely disgusted by everyone and everything. From the wasteful scourge that loves to punish Mother Earth with their repugnant, neverending consumption to the phonies who think that recycling plastics and buying hybrids make them eco-friendly, I’ve been on my […]

Where do you wanna do this?

It may sound far-fetched and perhaps even insane, but psychic dentistry is the one true way to tame your mouth aura.

Do you have a hard time stopping yourself from endless late night binges? Do you find that even hearing the word “exercise” evokes an involuntary gag reflex? And are you looking to lose weight? Here’s a diet I bet you haven’t tried yet: the wisdom teeth removal diet! Now, if you’ve already had yours removed, […]

By now, you’ve probably heard about Shailene Woodley’s advice to eat clay to rid your body of heavy metals and negative isotopes. No one knows what those are, but if you want to be pretty and rich like Shailene, you better have started adding a heaping side of earthenware to every meal. But Shailene never […]

Hi Bunny Ears readers. As you know we like to have fun here from time to time but right now we need to get real serious. You might know me as a hilarious and probably your favorite comedy writer, but I also have a higher purpose in life. I’m a face yoga instructor. What is […]

Skincare is all the rage and has been for centuries. Most of us apply a myriad of products to our face on a daily basis to maintain a soft, youthful glow. However, if you’ve found yourself stuck with skin that doesn’t want to change no matter what serum, cream, or emulsion you try, it’s possible […]

Do you want a tight vag or not?!

Sometimes what happens in Vegas doesn’t stay in Vegas.  (We’re looking at your tummy, Susan!)

One year ago, if you would have told me that I’d be sitting on a chair crafted from the bones of seemingly dozens of human bodies, I probably would have thought you were crazy. Yet here I am, sitting mere feet away from one of the most singularly terrifying figures in the landscape of alternative […]

In 2016, after my eighth round of IVF, I was finally blessed with my stunning designer triplets, Hayden, Kayden, and Dave. After becoming a mom, I started doing some hard soul-searching. What type of parent did I want to be? I was interested in combining parenting with the holistic, natural, and spiritual philosophies by which […]

Coughing directly in your child’s face is the ecological, non-toxic, and natural way to ensure they grow healthy immune systems.

Finally!

Hear me out, I don’t like the taste of piss. But I do like how it makes me appear interesting.

His blood is magic.

And yours can, too!

Try these handy tricks to both terrify and confuse them into submission.

Finally!

It started harmlessly enough. I’d gained a bit of winter weight, and I decided to kick my diet up a notch in the hopes of getting my abs back before #beachseason. I decided I’d cut out sugars, cut down on carbs. More leafy greens, more protein, more exercise. It was simple stuff. At first. As […]

We’re saying ‘yes’ to summer and ‘no more’ to your lawsuits!

And that’s the only reason.

After spending an entire weekend indoors baking and decorating like a madwoman, my Pinterest foodie page is off the frickin’ charts right now. Look at this pie. Look at it. When it comes to pretty food, I am Michelangelo. But just as you do not touch the ceiling of the Sistine Chapel, none of my […]

Hello, concerned adults and classmates! I’m a man now. I’m sorry you feel so threatened by this that you need to pretend your problem is with my beautiful lip fringe. Being a man means I can wear the same underwear for two weeks, shout horrible slurs playing PUBG, and start rumors about Anya using special-order jumbo […]

We checked.

Stop treating your A-hole like your B-hole.

Have you met Bacillus Subtilis?

You’ll never feel so alive.

We’ve got the ‘sticking stuff up your butt’ beat covered, thanks.

I know you’re just minding your own business, and as a grown up, you probably don’t want to be lifted off the ground. But let me crack your back. Please.

Bleaching your butthole is out. Bleaching then TIE-DYING your butthole is very in.

Because “cruelty-free” just isn’t enough.

You’ll be joyless, but beautiful!

Some of these really don’t look right.

The days are getting colder, and that means Father Depression is on his way.

It’s also incredibly painful.