We Talked To A Sex Therapist About Their Favorite ‘Friday The 13th’ Kills

When I sat down with renowned sex therapist Dr. Jen Heidegger, I hoped to get some expert tips on sex and intimacy, but what I got instead made me deeply uncomfortable. Dr. Heidegger would not stop talking about her favorite death scenes from the Friday the 13th franchise.

My first question for Dr. Heidegger was how couples might work their way out of a sexual dry spell. But she cut me off, saying she doesn’t always want to talk about sex. “People contain multitudes,” she told me. “I may be a sex therapist, but I also enjoy the various ways Jason Voorhees has killed teenagers throughout the 11 Friday the 13th movies.” Then she pulled out her phone and showed me a YouTube video from Friday the 13th: The Final Chapter where Jason sawed off a girl’s head and left it in the front seat of a truck for her friend to find.

Maybe it was my fault for not specifying when I reached out that I wanted to talk about sex. But I thought that was assumed, right? Why would I want to talk to a sex therapist about all the teenagers serial killer Jason Voorhees has murdered throughout the years?

Maybe It Was Part of Her Method? No.

I asked if these horrific videos of bloody kills were perhaps intended to help clients who were struggling with sexual compulsion. Maybe Dr. Heidegger would show an addict the scene from Jason Takes Manhattan where Jason punches a teen’s head off his shoulders in an attempt to take the patient’s mind off of sex? I know I had never personally been less aroused.

But that wasn’t the reason. “Again, what I’m talking about has nothing to do with sex therapy, and everything to do with teenagers getting their shit wrecked.” Then she pulled up the scene from A New Beginning where Jason takes hedge clippers to the neck of a poor girl who had her whole life ahead of her.

I told Dr. Heidegger that these sorts of violent movies make me very upset, but she didn’t seem to care. Instead, she pulled up a video called “Friday the 13th – ALL the TOP KILLS!” Looking closer, I saw that Dr. Heidegger had posted the video herself. She said, “This one’s from Part III, and I think when the harpoon is flying towards her it was supposed to be in 3D? Tight, huh?”

That one was really upsetting, and when I started to cry, Dr. Heidegger’s therapeutic side finally surfaced. Kind of. She nodded empathetically and gave me a tissue. “It’s important to remember,” she said, “that Jason has been to space. He dunked a girl’s head into a vat of liquid nitrogen and then shattered her face against the counter. It was unquestionably sick.”

Dr. Heidegger then asked me to please note that she’s available for both couple’s and individual counseling.

Images: Needpix, Paramount Pictures