(Jerking off outside.)
We would never want to cramp your hump-pumping with the cruel reality of below freezing weather.
Breathtaking.
As a man, I believe it’s unfair for any woman to have fun that I cannot partake in myself. That’s why I’m the reason all the local bars that offer “ladies nights” must now also offer “men’s nights” that I personally do not attend out of fear of those who do, which only proves my …
Continue reading “Compliments I Imagine You’ll Receive About This Fleshlight That’s Cleverly Disguised As A Gold Necklace”
After a long day of goat yoga and apple cider vinegar colonics, it can be hard to get to sleep. Just because you’ve gone to bed doesn’t mean you’re at rest. Here at Bunny Ears, we love capping off our nighttime routine by flicking it to a meditation. Specifically, a meditation read by Logan Coleman, …
Continue reading “Meditations That Will Help You Sleep If You Jerk Off To The Sexy Australian Voice Reading Them”
They’re judging you, Sarah.
We can approximate Muppet genitals based on their design with the following colorful sex toys clearly designed to simulate Muppintercourse.
It’s something every parent wonders.
How good are you at compartmentalizing?
It’s gotta be good for something, right?
There are so many substances you can use to masturbate. All that I ask is that you don’t use my luxurious moisturizer. It’s not too much to ask, is it?
