Brian Boone writes comedy and trivia on the internet and in books, which is like the old timey internet. He shamed his family by losing on Jeopardy.
Introducing Culk-Inn, The World’s First Macaulay Culkin-Themed Luxury Hotel
Note: We only serve cheese pizza.
Everything We Want In The Inevitable C+C Music Factory Biopic
It’s the movie we’ve all been begging for.
3 Lesser-Known Wrestling Holds Perfect For A No Holds Barred Match
Have you heard of the ‘Reverse Heimlich’?
A Comprehensive Review Of All The Best Monocles—Finally!
What ho, assorted plutocrats, barons of industry, and proper gentlemen!
I’m Just A Boy Who Loves His Blob (Yes, Sexually)
If you have a problem with that, you can get out of my life.
An Exit Interview With Our Office Assistant, Jason Waterfalls
Don’t go, Jason Waterfalls!
The 4 Best Video Game Musical Adaptations Of All Time
“It’s-A Me! Mario!” and other classics.
Did Collective Soul Actually Exist?
Hey, remember Collective Soul, that mildly agreeable rock band from the ’90s? It’s weird if you do, because as it turns out, it never existed.
Every Culkin Brother Ranked (By Macaulay Culkin)
Finally, we know which Culkin is best and which is worst. And who has more authority to speak on the subject than Macaulay Culkin himself?
Glasses You’ll Look Hot In Provided You Are Already Hot
Want to look hot? Get a pair of glasses They’ll make you look hot. Especially if you’re already hot.
Bunny Ears Exclusive: Sgt. Slaughter Tells All!
Remember the military guy from the ’80s heyday of the WWF? He’s radically different out of the ring…emphasis on “radical.”
Exclusive: A Rebuttal from Little Miss Can’t Be Wrong
Nearly 30 years later, the subject of the Spin Doctors’ memorable hit gives HER side of the story.
Fuck Your Tree The Way It Deserves To Be Fucked This Arbor Day
Show your tree how much you love it…physically.
Travel Guide: Under The Sea
The ocean is terrible and full of scary fish and fish-monsters. Why do you want to go there? What’s wrong with you?
Things To Do With The Scarabs That Keep Crawling Out Of Your Mouth
Stop spitting them into the garbage and do something useful with those beetles that emerge from your mouth for inscrutable reasons.
Vince McMahon’s Post-XFL Forays Into Other Sports
After the XFL tanked in 2001, Vince McMahon tried to WWE-ify other sports. Really. He really did.
Hot Fashion Trend: Wearing Your Parents’ Underwear
Your mom’s sensible beige bra is going to look soooo good on you.
Spring Scents That Will Drive Him Deep Into A Depressive Episode
Ladies, these spring perfumes will strongly remember him of springs from long ago AND send him into a downward spiral over deep feelings of loss.
Fun Ways To Ask Your Cool Teens If They’ve Had A BM Today
Everybody poops. Even your edgy teen.
You’ll Never Guess The Secret Ingredient In My Leprechaun Blood Cleanse!
Hint: It’s not Lucky Charms.
Why We Had A Water Birth At The City Swimming Pool
It’s so much healthier to bring your baby into the world with a water birth. And it costs next to nothing to do it down at the local pool!
All The Things We Love About The Royal Throuple
It’s so weird that most of us were scandalized when Prince William and Princess Kate decided to take on a third party into their marriage.
Stick This In Your Butt To Meet An ER Doctor This Valentine’s Day!
No need to thank us.
Choose Circumcision! We Need To Keep Appeasing The Foreskin Wizard
Whatever you think you know is really just the tip.
I’m So Tired Of My Female Friends Putting Me In The Warp Zone
This always happens to me!
Creative Solutions To Male-Pattern Baldness
There has to be a head transplant list by now, right?
The Realm of The Piss Demon And Other Dirtiest Places In Your Home
The toilet is where the pee-pee and poops leave your body,
Fall Activities That Are More Fun With The Cloaked Man
His name and intent remain unknown.
How I Once Used A Bathroom In A Public Park Without Contracting Cholera
I know, it sounds ludicrous, but I assure you this is no joke.
Stop Body Shaming And Accept Yourself As You Are, Unless You’re James
Hey James, fuck you you disgusting shit. Everyone else, please learn to accept your body as it is!