My Friend Bet Me I Couldn’t Survive A Night In The Wilderness
Survival Diary, Day 1: F**k you, Trevor. That’s right. I’m doing it. “You wouldn’t last a day,” you said. “You’ll sober up on the ride home.” Well guess what? There was no ride home. I took that Uber straight to Rocky Mountain National Park. It was a $147 dollars, but that’s fine. I’ll just take […]
Mmm Look at This Pie I Baked That None of My Thin Children Are Allowed to Eat
After spending an entire weekend indoors baking and decorating like a madwoman, my Pinterest foodie page is off the frickin’ charts right now. Look at this pie. Look at it. When it comes to pretty food, I am Michelangelo. But just as you do not touch the ceiling of the Sistine Chapel, none of my […]
Get Your Strongest Core Ever With Nonstop Crying!
Some call it “Sob Crunches” while others like myself prefer “Exer-crying”.
Rusev Gets Revenge By Fucking Bobby Lashley’s Lat Pulldown Machine
It’s the thing Bobbly Lashley loves most.
Biodegradable Workout Equipment You’ll Only Use Once Anyway
Want to save the planet AND keep being an unimprovable slob? Our biodegradable work-out equipment lets you finally feel good about doing nothing!
Lose 20 Friends with These 30-Minute Workouts
Want to makeover not just your body but your whole dang life?
I Keep Accidentally Going To Spin Classes That Turn Out To Be Cleverly Named Laundromats
I ended up leaving after they finished playing “You Spin Me Right Round (Like A Record)” by Dead Or Alive for the sixth time. Is this all they play at this place, like, constantly on loop?
Charitable Pooping Is A Thing And Allow Me To Explain
Ever feel like you’re letting your poops go to waste? Have you ever considered dropping them on the doorstep of people who may or may not need them?
A Guide To Detoxing Your Red Dead Online Character
More than 150 million Americans play video games, many online. And from what we’ve heard, online gaming is apparently one of the most toxic environments around.
Poop Doulas And 4 Other Types Of Doulas You Didn’t Know You Need
A good doula is duty-bound to help you do things your way!
Make Eye Contact With The Groupon People In Your Pilates Class
At Bunny Ears we’re all about finding new ways to give back while still putting yourself first
We Asked A Personal Trainer For Workout Tips And Now We’re Fucking
We really meant to get into this whole workout thing, but then we just got carried away with the fucking. You get it, right?
I Started Foam Rolling And Now I’m Tumbling Down A Hill At 50mph
Foam rolling is a great way to elongate your spine and eliminate back pain. Keeping a foam roller in your house will ensure that your back is straight and your feet are tripped every time you try to walk through the living room. I purchased a foam roller, and it came with a brochure titled […]
This Cannabis Yoga Class Will Get You So High You’ll Forget You’re Doing Yoga
Now that cannabis is legal in nine of the chillest states in the U.S., a few select gyms are offering cannabis yoga classes. Studies conducted at Dr. Big Dawg’s Dope Research Institute show that getting super high and doing yoga rules. We’re not going to take science’s word for it, though. I went out into […]
Let Me Impart Some Wisdom On You: This Diet Rules
Do you have a hard time stopping yourself from endless late night binges? Do you find that even hearing the word “exercise” evokes an involuntary gag reflex? And are you looking to lose weight? Here’s a diet I bet you haven’t tried yet: the wisdom teeth removal diet! Now, if you’ve already had yours removed, […]