Tag Archives: family

Yes, even seventeen months after they died in that tragic safari giraffe stampede accident.

Obadiah died in war!

Let’s throw up together!

I swear to fucking God they better after all of this bullshit I went through this year.

This Thanksgiving turkey is just the opportunity you need to have at least one thing go right. And you really need it because, let’s be honest, you can really use a win right now.

Get ready.

You have questions, this luxurious cashmere beanie has answers. Everything from relationship advice to grooming habits, this cashmere beanie can help!

We’re tired of it!

Seriously. You have a problem.

Like an Old Fashioned!

It’s a surefire way to survive the day intact.

Your whole life is a lie, but you deserved that promotion.

The title ‘Sir Mix-a-Lot’ goes back centuries.

It’s been a game-changer.

I realized I was doing everything exactly right.

It’s easy!

X-Box controllers are expensive. Try throwing these unimportant things instead.

Finally, we know which Culkin is best and which is worst. And who has more authority to speak on the subject than Macaulay Culkin himself?

Will they be able to keep up with all those little creeps, goobers, freak-balls and toenail chewers? I’m just not convinced.

“Has this white woman ever had chicken before?” My dad asks, staring at the chicken. “This tastes like the ghost of flavored meat,” My mom says.

I tried out this new Face/Off procedure so I could see what I could learn about my childhood in order to be able to exploit it for an internet article. Here is what I learned.

Hint: You’re not going to want to go anywhere near a What Kind of Fast Food are You Based on Your Zodiac article if you’re a Pisces!

Every dad has a pants pickle ready to tickle, but we don’t always put it out there in the best light. Well that ends now.