This Thanksgiving turkey is just the opportunity you need to have at least one thing go right. And you really need it because, let’s be honest, you can really use a win right now.
Modern guys just aren’t cutting it for me.
If you’ve tried all the face masks, you’ll love this hot new trend where you win a Kid’s Choice Award so Nickelodeon will give you a slime face mask.
I’ve got stuffing in the oven, and I don’t mean the one in my kitchen!
Better safe than sorry! Time to replace all my poop with someone else’s poop!
Stop what you’re doing, grab your travel journal, and take note, ’cause I’m going to run down the five Rite Aids you MUST visit before you eat the big one.
Everyone needs a good post-divorce craft project, even if it means building a whole new family who will never desert me out of fruit.
I think you’re afraid to know true enlightenment. I get it, navigating the higher planes of existence can be scary at first.
Nowadays, thankfully, there are many different kinds of hats that prevent thought-theft… too many, in fact.
Seeking a spirit animal can be hard, so we recommend this LG Electronics 84-Inch Cinema 3D 4K Ultra HD 120hz Smart TV with six pairs of 3D glasses purchased through our amazon affiliate link!
At first, Andrea was hesitant to take our suggestion that she try aerial yoga for this article, which we respectfully acknowledged. Then she started screaming.
With a little of that sweet, sweet Uncle Sam start-up money and some human ingenuity, you, too, can rent a luxury water vehicle.
Nothing beats curling up with a good book, flipping through its pages, holding it right side up, and, of course, telling people you’re reading it so they think you’re smart.
Few have been able to identify what the sun actually is. Until now.
Sometimes it feels like, no matter how large your crystal collection, no matter how many organic recipes you master, it’s simply never enough to fill the void you feel tugging at your soul.
You’re going to fuck this up
We spoke with Marvelous Meats’ CEO Rodger Diaz about his potentially game-changing screaming beef that psychologically satisfies.
You have two problems: no plans for Thanksgiving Dinner, and an abundance of just terrible Pokemon. Why not have one problem solve the other?
We shouldn’t let our thirst for power interfere with our compassion for our spiritual companions.
There are many ways to handle being called out by black people, so here are our favorites!
You know what they say: You can’t screw up pizza! But we’re gonna try.
“Look out! Macaulay Culkin has a gun!”
You better hope your colon is in order, because I’m about to blow the shit straight out of you.
I know there have been a lot of questions since I, Quarog The World Eater, appeared in the space that surrounds your planet.
I didn’t expect anyone to understand the sacrifice I was making through my hunger strike, but I really didn’t expect them to vehemently insist I keep going.
Autumn is the perfect time to tackle a project like knitting a beautiful scarf, one that could finesse your whole look if you finished it, which you won’t.
Turn your stupid fat American child into a glorious, perfectly-behaved little Madeline thanks to a strict French diet!
When celebs spill the beans on the best countries to open an offshore bank account to hide their wealth from different governments, we’re here for it.
She has such good taste, and really springs for the good stuff!
Just because it’s a DIY neopagan water birth taking place in a tiny yurt does not mean there are no rules.
Your favorite color reveals both your preferences for physical and spiritual connections, but also some pretty graphic details about how you’ll snuff it.
Get ready.
Check out our exclusive serial killer style guide for fall 2018.
7 steps to protect your marriage from the grips of Frankenstein Monsters.
You’re focusing on trying to enter a zone of heightened consciousness, but your guided meditation instructor keeps saying ‘marinate’ instead of ‘meditate.’
I mean seriously, come on, Titanic II? That has us written all over it.
After discovering a murderous golem in my community, I tracked it down and killed it to create my very own golem clay mask. And you can, too!
Feelings are so hot
Why waste time boiling stacks of the flayed dead so you can suckle the runoff when you can cut out the middle man and get all the nutrients you need direct from the source?
Negative energy is the most underrated problem affecting your everyday life—and it mostly comes from your nefarious electrical appliances.
What better way to pay respect to the pets you miss than to plant a produce garden in their name, right on top of their graves?
Instead of candy, give your neighbors what they really want this Halloween: a comprehensive sexual education via seasonal and sensual pumpkins!
These delicious, healthful activated cashews are so godammned good you’ll literally feel like you’re getting pounded by Mr. Peanut.
No man should be going around calling women names unless they are in my bed, kitchen, or bathtub and I am about 30 seconds away from le petit mort.