How To Surreptitiously Moisturize Your Husband
Is your husband’s skin dry, cracked, or scaly? Here’s some sneaky, virtually fool-proof ways to get that man to moisturize.
Charitable Pooping Is A Thing And Allow Me To Explain
Ever feel like you’re letting your poops go to waste? Have you ever considered dropping them on the doorstep of people who may or may not need them?
Our Festival Season Guide To The Most Luxe Antibiotics
Our hot new antibiotics primer let’s you get the most out of this year’s music festival without looking like a basic penicillin loser.
Fuck Your Tree The Way It Deserves To Be Fucked This Arbor Day
Show your tree how much you love it…physically.
Things To Do With The Scarabs That Keep Crawling Out Of Your Mouth
Stop spitting them into the garbage and do something useful with those beetles that emerge from your mouth for inscrutable reasons.
We Hired An Expert To Smell Our Farts
We believe in being introspective and learning about ourselves. That’s why we hired serious professionals to smell our farts.
Fresh Herbs To Plant In That Indent Left By Your Waistband
Time to roll up your sleeves, roll down your waistband, and tend to an indent herb garden of your own.
Swimming with Lobsters Might Be The Key to Curing Anxiety
“As I waded into a murky backyard pool in Long Beach, California, I felt that familiar tightening in my gut. My anxiety was rearing its ugly head, reminding me that I have an ever-present passenger. I continued forward, my lonely thighs now fully submerged, and felt a pinch. Then two more. I was not alone […]
The Best Anti-Aging Secret Is Still A Portrait That Grows Old For You
You’ll look fabulous—no matter how many atrocities you commit!
Moisturize Until You’re Frictionless And Entering The Speed Force
You will reach unfathomable velocity.
‘I Don’t See Disease’ Is The Hottest New Health Trend!
Don’t let disease get you down. Fight through your illness with our bold new method of denying its existence! You’ll be healthy in no time!
Western Medicine Is A Lie: What Are Penises REALLY For?!??!!!!!??!
Penii? Penes? Amanda, what am I supposed to write here?
Make The Most Of Your Dying Days And Multi-Task Your Bucket List
You’re going to die and nobody has a clue how it’s going to go down.
Should I Use Nanotechnology To Turn My Stomach Into Several Cow Stomachs?
So I Can Thrive On Just Grass?
I’m Totally Okay Being Trapped Under This Weighted Blanket
Getting crushed to death never felt so safe.
We Asked A Personal Trainer For Workout Tips And Now We’re Fucking
We really meant to get into this whole workout thing, but then we just got carried away with the fucking. You get it, right?
Reminder: Your Neti Pot Is The Best Way To Drown Yourself On Dry Land
Free yourself of sinus infections once and for all (and confound investigators).
Kelly Tries It: DIY Fecal Transplant
Better safe than sorry! Time to replace all my poop with someone else’s poop!
We Made Andrea Try Aerial Yoga Even Though She Begged Us To Just Let Her Work
At first, Andrea was hesitant to take our suggestion that she try aerial yoga for this article, which we respectfully acknowledged. Then she started screaming.
Why Does Everyone Keep Telling Me My Hunger Strike Is A Great Idea And I Should Stick To It?
I didn’t expect anyone to understand the sacrifice I was making through my hunger strike, but I really didn’t expect them to vehemently insist I keep going.
Using Small Amounts Of Products My Boyfriends Wife Has In Her Bathroom Improved My Skin
She has such good taste, and really springs for the good stuff!
How To Care For My Emotional Support Dog During My Home Water Birth
Just because it’s a DIY neopagan water birth taking place in a tiny yurt does not mean there are no rules.
I Murdered a Golem And Made A Soothing Clay Mask!
After discovering a murderous golem in my community, I tracked it down and killed it to create my very own golem clay mask. And you can, too!
You’re Only Taking Yoga Classes So You Can Learn To Go Down On Yourself. Own it
Here’s a scenario: You’re in your first yoga class ever and you accidentally reveal that the only reason you’re there is so you can become limber enough to orally pleasure yourself. The class is stunned by your admission, and you’re shocked to discover that people do yoga for reasons other than orally pleasuring themselves. No […]
People Always Told Me I Couldn’t Start My Own Bee Farm, So I Proved Them Right
People always told me there was no way I’d ever be able to manage a hive of bees like the trendy rooftop beekeepers of New York City, and oh boy, did it feel good to silence all the haters when I proved them right. I think I knew I wouldn’t be a good beekeeper when […]
Sick Tricks To Do While Breastfeeding Your Baby
At Bunny Ears, we do our best to help turn new moms into supermoms. Now that you’ve survived labor and lost the baby weight, it’s time for an actual challenge! Check out these super-sick breastfeeding tricks, each one guaranteed to turn your daily milking into the intense, body-busting competitive sport you better rock if you […]
I Cured My Body Image Issues By Smashing All The Mirrors In My Town
I’ve never been what one would call “conventionally attractive.” I’ve struggled with my weight since I was a kid, and I’m below average, height-wise. Mean classmates (and my parents) called me Grimace. My body image issues got so bad that I loathed and feared looking in the bathroom mirror each day. But I’m proud to say […]
I Started Foam Rolling And Now I’m Tumbling Down A Hill At 50mph
Foam rolling is a great way to elongate your spine and eliminate back pain. Keeping a foam roller in your house will ensure that your back is straight and your feet are tripped every time you try to walk through the living room. I purchased a foam roller, and it came with a brochure titled […]