Lifestyle

To make sure you don’t get caught dead with last year’s trends, here’s a round-up of what’s in and what’s out this fall.

I think the single most frustrating part of being a woman must be when men don’t take you seriously. As I was explaining to my sister the other day, this problem springs from a refusal to listen to and understand women’s issues. But as a strong male ally, I always completely get what women are […]

Free-bleeding during your period is, of course, one of the most intense and respectful ways to embody our connection with Gaia. When we allow our menstrual blood to saturate our Lululemons without processed, cancer-causing tampons or pads in the way, we acknowledge ourselves as women, as complete beings, and of course, as superior to Margot […]

It can happen to anyone.

Honestly, what is bird box and why are all of my friends talking about it?

Where are you going to go for Weed Christmas? Are you staying home? If so, here are the best spots for that perfect 4/20 vacation in your drab apartment.

It’s summer, and at Bunny Ears, that means exactly two things: taco bowls and experimenting with dangerously powerful exotic hallucinogens from around the globe. Why not mix the two? After all, psychoactive substances have proven spiritual and psychological benefits, and taco bowls are delicious. To ensure a taco bowl of maximum mind-opening, exotic flavor, we’ll […]

Words of affirmation cost extra.

We get it. Rearranging your heavy furniture just to change things up isn’t enticing enough to waste a weekend afternoon. But what if we told you there was a way to arrange your couch, side tables, and even that bowl of potpourri in a way that will harmonize your home with the erotic frequencies of […]

Because who has time for forests?

Use words like ‘imagery’ and ‘prose.’

Seriously. So positive.

It’s hard, but it’s possible.

Hey, these are amazon links. If you actually buy some stuff we get a little bit of money. HISDERN Plaid Tie And Handkerchief Ok, Fine. Soophen Mens Necktie Sure. ABP Ties For Men: Set Of Two Fuck it.

After spending an entire weekend indoors baking and decorating like a madwoman, my Pinterest foodie page is off the frickin’ charts right now. Look at this pie. Look at it. When it comes to pretty food, I am Michelangelo. But just as you do not touch the ceiling of the Sistine Chapel, none of my […]

It was all for naught.

People say it’s not about the destination but the journey to get there—but I say as long as you made it there in one piece, who cares how it happened.

And the eggs are hard boiled, so brunch is served!

Love kimchi? Need to dispose of a body? Well you’re in luck!

It’s a simple thing, but I think it is worth it.

TIME TO RE-HY-DRATE!

Fashion is cyclical. What used to be popular decades ago will be popular again. (Get ready for powdered wigs and not showering!) That’s why it’s crucial that you buy all the baggy pants you’ll need in 20 years in bulk now so you’re ready when they become popular again. Don’t think baggy pants could ever […]

I gave birth to him, and I can un-give it.

Many food companies will try to promise you “guilt-free” snacking with “healthy” snack alternatives but let’s get real here: there is no guiltless snacking. When Eve took that bite of the apple back in Bible times, God’s wrath descended upon humans and decreed “Thou shalt not snack unless you feel immediate regret. I mean good […]

Hello, concerned adults and classmates! I’m a man now. I’m sorry you feel so threatened by this that you need to pretend your problem is with my beautiful lip fringe. Being a man means I can wear the same underwear for two weeks, shout horrible slurs playing PUBG, and start rumors about Anya using special-order jumbo […]

Oh boy, I hope I get to lick a doorknob!

Hey guys, I’m so glad that you came to check out my fave sugar cookie recipe! I know you probably just want to scroll down to the ingredients and get the recipe, but I’m going to make that as difficult for you as possible. Some might say I’m holding the recipe hostage. But instead of […]

We as a society place a lot of restrictions on ourselves when it comes to relationships. But I’m here to let you know it’s OK to be spontaneous. Happy, even! As long as your sexual proclivities are between two (or more) consenting adults you can just feel free to go right on and let your […]

Both prenatal and postnatal self-care are vital when it comes to motherhood. The right foods, supplements, and healthful habits can make all the difference when your little one arrives, and this is perhaps especially true when it comes to avoiding postpartum depression. While there’s no one way to 100% guarantee that postpartum depression won’t happen […]

Yes, even the cute ones. Especially the cute ones. Mmmmm delicious wildlife preservation.

I have a serious medical/spiritual condition that people desperately need to made more aware of. Kids today are going crazy for spirit animals but they are not aware how harmful and dangerous they can be. Everyone thinks finding out your spirit animal will be fun and enlightening, but in reality, it could end with you […]

An ancient and terrifying power lurks inside you… congratulations, you are about to give birth to a baby! Now you must announce the coming of your child to the world, so that all inhabitants of earth may prepare themselves for your spawn’s unbridled potential. And what better way to do that than a gender reveal […]

When you grow up in a house with seven brothers, you learn certain habits that last a lifetime.

I don’t know how it works, but it does!

Weddings, the bane of any 20-something guest’s pocketbook. Don’t get me wrong, who doesn’t love a good wedding? The food is a step above cafeteria (mass produced but actually damn good), everyone is dressed to the nines (a favorite trait of yours truly) and the possibilities for where the night could go, on wings of […]

Minimalism is here to stay. What’s the point of filling your domicile with meaningless junk when there’s no point to anything? If you’re ready to dive into the design style that answers the question “what brings me joy?” with “almost nothing,” here’s a few rules of thumb for making your dwelling look as empty as […]

They mostly told us to optimize vertical space?

In our identity-obsessed culture, it’s dangerous to put people in boxes—both literally and figuratively. But while there’s no one way to define a soul, there are definitely strong universal energies which we all possess that help define who we are. And today, I want to talk specifically about Big Dick Energy (BDE). Everyone and their […]

Having a personal trainer is great but who likes working out? Why move your body around like a poor building rocks for money or whatever when you could just wait for a sexy android body to come on the market someday? It’s tough; the urge to call your personal trainer at 3AM to screech JUST […]

This is a story of a sweet, innocent young woman letting go, embracing her kinky side, and learning to reconcile those two facets of her personality. I was a sexually inexperienced grad student when I first met “Dan,” an interior designer whose taste in decor was pretty standard, but whose sexual proclivities were anything but […]

Despondence and self-loathing suck, but what sucks even more is not profiting from yours. How often have you been on Facebook or Twitter, complaining that your life is a bleak pit of despair, only for someone to come along and mention that, in addition to their near unspeakable level of existential malaise, their cat just […]

From fruit rinds to vacuum packing!

I forgot to pay a parking ticket because it was buried under greasy KFC boxes and dead spiders on my desk.