I’m going to kick their ass.
Rummage through the trash of life and find your true self!
We need to turn the car around.
I’m actually very boring.
I truly don’t know how much clearer I can be on this.
Because who has time for forests?
You’re welcome, world.
Allow us to help.
Rory can’t be trusted.
Yes, the earth is dying, but check out these glitter pens!
We just want Daniel to be happy.
It’s better here.
We don’t recommend dying anytime soon.
For curious mediators.
It can be hard for them to understand.
It’s been a game-changer.
Heading out into the wilderness for some hiking is a great way to reconnect with your true self and get your ass bit by majestic nature.
The hyena ambush really sealed the deal.
It’s also calling each new challenge “mandated knowledge”?
Do you know the signs?
Because you don’t need it.
Don’t let the stress of a home invasion get to you.
But why, though?
Have you heard of the Waxing Ex Crescent moon?
For a mere $499!
We will not be offering refunds.
He keeps yapping “In my room, I want you here.”
Build upon shared interests.
Oh, you think that’s dark, do you? Let me tell you what’s dark, my breezy bunny child.
Being a stepmom is tough, but it can also be rewarding, like when your stepson begrudgingly says you can ride with him to your five-year high school reunion.
I realized I was doing everything exactly right.
We’re all going to die someday, but dumb toddlers usually don’t figure that out so soon. Whoops.
The secret to rebuilding my confidence was admitting that I needed help – the help of a trusted therapist and of a pair of 5-foot-tall circus stilts.
I make sure my child’s creativity stays strong and vibrant by keeping him in an empty room.
We need to teach our boys consent, mutual respect, and how to freaking rock at magic.
My leash kid is on a leash. The dogs are on leashes. I don’t see the problem?
Self care is important. That’s why we want you to listen to your body. No, like REALLY listen to it. Know what we’re saying?
Having mulled over all the evidence since the dawn of time, we’ve realized that sex with men was an atrocious mistake, and we must apologize.
If you’re gonna sacrifice a virgin, you better sacrifice a virgin the right way.
Do animals put you in a better mood? Then you have to try the latest self-care trend, featuring adorable badgers! They’re cuddlier than they look!
This amazing new tobacco plant is all-natural and therefore must be healthy. Right?
If My Kids Love Me So Much, Why Won’t They Donate To My Patreon
Look, we all know you only browse yoga articles because maybe you’ll see a nipple or something. Whatever.
We dove deep to find out exactly where you should be pooping. You’re welcome!
